


Tomorrow's Hopes

by PerditaAlottachocolate



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Adrinette, Complicated Relationships, Day 1 - oneshot, Divorce, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, ML fic appreciation week, Married DJWifi, New Beginnings, New Hope, Second Chances, based on Tomorrow's Troubles, married ChloNath
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-17
Updated: 2017-12-02
Packaged: 2018-12-03 09:15:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 21,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11529219
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PerditaAlottachocolate/pseuds/PerditaAlottachocolate
Summary: After over 15 years Ladybug and Chat Noir had finally defeated Hawk Moth and decided to give up their miraculouses. After over 15 years Adrien was finally going learn his partner’s secret identity, as they had promised themselves. What he didn’t expect was to find out that it had been his ex-wife hiding behind the red mask. It seemed like fate had given them a second chance, but would they both be equally eager to take it?A continuation of "Tomorrow’s Troubles" by AmyNChanMiraculous Fic Appreciation Week, Day 1 - oneshot





	1. Yesterday

**Author's Note:**

  * For [AmyNChan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmyNChan/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Tomorrow's Troubles](https://archiveofourown.org/works/10315241) by [AmyNChan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmyNChan/pseuds/AmyNChan). 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a continuation of AmyNChan's story for ML Ultimate Guess Who Challenge - "Tomorrow’s Troubles".
> 
> I was surprised how that story spoke to me. Suddenly the need to know how it could have been resolved was so strong that I started writing.  
> I want to thank AmyNChan for letting me do this. I hope you're not going to be disappointed with my idea.
> 
> This was supposed to be oneshot for oneshot, but unfortunately I didn't have enough time to finish. So instead I divided the story into three chapters. This is the first one.

It was already dusk outside when the light touch of her lips on his forehead stirred him from his slumber. Adrien woke up but kept his eyes closed, savoring the moment. If someone told him yesterday that he'll wake up next to his ex-wife, he'd laugh bitterly at the poor joke or possibly punched them in the face, as the wound that the divorce had made was still too fresh.

But it wasn't a dream. He really felt her warmth on the pillow and her scent was everywhere. He had no idea that he'd missed her so much, that ragged hollow ripped in his heart long ago filling up with affection all of a sudden.

Somehow, miraculously, Marinette was back in his life and he just started to believe that there still was a chance that everything was going to be all right, that they could put it back together.

Adrien untangled his arm from the sheets to reach for her and pull her closer. He opened his eyes only to see his hand touch the empty side of his bed.

He shrugged. She probably was in the bathroom.

_Click-clack._

The front door lock.

_Silence._

Absence.

_Rustle of paper when his hand found an envelope._

Adrien felt an unpleasant surge in his stomach.

'Nettie?'

No reply.

'Net, you there?'

Absolute silence.

'Marinette?!' He called panicky, jumping out of bed.

 

***

 

It took one bottle of wine and the comfort of his couch to untangle his tongue and relax his muscles, stiffened from the moment he had seen Marinette’s face peeking at him with anxious curiosity at Master Fu’s parlor that morning.

They had left Fu’s house in painful silence, none of them finding words that would seem adequate. They took a stroll down the Seine as the sun rose over them on the first miraculousless day of the rest of their lives. Somewhere along the way he discovered his fingers had entwined with hers and their pace had fallen into a well oiled routine not unlike that of Ladybug’s and Chat Noir’s patrols.

Adrien was the first to break the silence when they were nearing his place, only to invite her for breakfast.

More silence was served at his apartment as neither of them seemed hungry. Adrien could account only for himself but it wasn’t long after their last rooftop picnic and his stomach was clenched to the size of a pea anyway. Marinette wrapped herself around a steaming mug of coffee and buried deep between the cushions on the sofa.

Adrien settled for ice tea, which he then traded for a glass of wine even though it wasn’t even noon yet. His ex-wife soon followed keeping her distance and carefully avoiding his gaze.

She let her gorgeous midnight-blue hair fall in gentle waves, framing her tired face and spilling over her shoulders like a velvety blanket. He felt hypnotized with the sight. It took all of his willpower not to rush to her in an instant. He was itching to bury his fingers in that silky veil, to brush the gentle curve of her alabaster neck and jaw line, to uncover her ear and smooth it in a soft kiss that he knew would elicit a gasp from her delicious lips.

The portent silence persisted although with every sip of wine it was becoming more and more comfortable.

 

When all of his defenses dissolved in alcohol the words started flowing. Words of hurt, words of regret, words of remorse, words of apology. Words that drew them closer, than opened the dams built in self-defense long ago. They longed for each other’s touch, thirsty for love. They held each other, mourning the loss of their kwamis, their freedom and their oblivion.

In the darkest times of their lives Ladybug and Chat Noir had always comforted each other, had always got each other’s back. But this? This was so much more. With the biggest mystery of their adulthood shifted away they both felt bare, beaten.

They took a dive into that familiar comfort of the arms of the loved one. No confessions, no grand gestures, all the pent up emotions conveyed to touch, to warmth, to closeness they both thought had been lost forever.

When he was falling asleep wrapped around Marinette’s lithe body, new hope was pouring into his soul. It whispered of second chances, of new beginnings, of uttered promises.

Now he stared at the empty living room, at the coffee mugs and wine glasses, uneaten food and half-finished bottles at the coffee table, at the messy sofa where the passion had found them, looking for any clues as to why he was alone again.

The one and only clue was resting in his hand, still unopened. Adrien slipped into stupor again, unable to make any kind of decision.

It might have seemed that with the veil of secrets lifted that morning all doubts would have dispelled by now, alleged betrayals explained, and the air would finally be clear. The secret identities and the miraculouses were after all the obvious reason for all those hitherto unexplained absences, late returns, sudden departures. The trust that was broken finally could be mended.

So why wasn’t it obvious? Why wasn’t he chasing after her or trying to stop her in another way?

The letter in his hand suddenly seemed to weigh much more than a mere sheet of paper. Why was he dreading so much to open it and read it?

 

Adrien knew exactly what answers he was so afraid to find to all those questions.

 

Because the miraculouses weren’t the only circumstances responsible for their break-up. Because her accusations still rang in his ears, and his allegations in return still burned his tongue.

Because not all absences, missed calls, nights outside home were covered by akuma attacks or patrols.

Because at the back of his head that horrible thought still lurked that she wasn’t as faithful as she vowed. And he knew perfectly well he had given her enough reasons to think the same about him.

 

With that terrible weight resting in the pit of his stomach Adrien finally gathered his courage and opened the letter.

 

* * *

* * *

 

 

 

> _My Dearest,_
> 
> _Thank you._
> 
> _Thank you for being Chat Noir. Thank you for being Adrien. Thank you for being your wonderful self._
> 
> _You were my strength, my light and inspiration, my dream and joy._
> 
> _I’m sorry I have caused you so much pain. I hope you know I’ve never meant to hurt you and yet it seems that with every decision I’ve made, I’ve hurt a side of you. This is a burden I will carry for the rest of my life._
> 
> _I wish I could turn back time and take that leap of faith you always wanted to take. I wish I could trust you like you once trusted me. But I cannot do that._
> 
> _Yesterday night I thought I was about to welcome an old friend in a new life. But instead it was you who welcomed me again in your home and in your heart. And I don’t think I deserve that._
> 
> _There are things that I have to consider, actions that I have to think about. And I need to do that by myself and alone. 15 years is a lot of time to think about. You too have matters to attend to and a journey to take. Probably as much thinking if not more._
> 
> _Despite all we’ve been through, I’m really glad it was you._
> 
> _My heart always has been and always will be yours._
> 
> _Marinette_

* * *

* * *

 

Her letter did nothing to dismiss his concerns. Only multiplied the questions crowding in on his tortured head.

What decisions did she had in mind? What actions? Did she mean only Ladybug’s persistence in not revealing themselves earlier? Did she mean the breach of trust this decision had caused as they were unable to explain themselves without mentioning the miraculous? Or did she mean… _the other two_?

 

Adrien read the letter so many times that before dawn he could close his eyes and still see the elegant lines of Marinette’s handwriting. At first light he prepared a fresh pot of coffee and settled on the couch. He considered fixing himself a drink, but quickly dismissed the idea. His head was already reeling without any additional boost.

How did they manage to screw this up so badly? It seemed they were two halves of a whole and the fact that they had received complementary miraculouses could only serve as further evidence. Both in their secret and civilian lives they had managed to come together, they were meant to be together. But they weren’t. Not anymore.

 

Adrien didn’t remember the beginning of the end. For him things started to get worse soon after their wedding. Before they moved in together it was easier to evade her questions, to come with alibis or simply play dumb. It was also easier to ignore her absences, constant late arrivals and poor excuses. But with them sharing a home it became difficult to come up with new explanations or pretexts and the weight of his secret was getting bigger with every passing day.

After a while Chat Noir decided to discuss the matter with Ladybug - pleading with her to reveal themselves to each other. He couldn’t imagine disclosing himself to anyone but his partner first. When she declined, he informed her of his intent to reveal his identity to his wife, but the idea scared Ladybug to such extend that she actually begged him to reconsider. The risks and stakes were too high. At that point they both already felt final encounter approaching. The possibility of Hawk Moth akumatizing his wife, learning his identity and thereby jeopardizing all that they’d been fighting for was terrifying. At that the subject was dropped and Adrien went home to lie to Marinette again. And again. And again.

He watched her slowly slipping out of his reach when he fed her lie after lie. For her own good, her own safety. He should have known she despised lies. But he chose loyalty to his miraculous and the vow he made to Ladybug all those years ago.

With clenching heart Adrien witnessed as the joy in Marinette’s bluebell eyes started to fade together with her natural bubbliness. She started to go out in the evenings more and more often. Then from time to time she was out for whole weekends. Adrien assumed she needed this time to vent to Alya as he in turn started to spend more time with Chloé. They renewed their friendship for which Adrien was grateful - when Alya and Nino got married it became awkward to hang out with his best friend knowing that Marinette took refuge at their house. Adrien didn’t want to remind her of his faults even more.

But then he met Nathaniel at Chloé’s. Quiet and shy Nathaniel who grew up to become an artist. Small and withdrawn Nathaniel who became a confident and headstrong man, a man who managed to tame Chloé and make her his own. Sneaky and deceitful Nathaniel who remained Marinette’s friend in art throughout the years and then, when she was becoming most vulnerable, provided her with an arm to cry on, a haven of his workshop, and his steadfast presence.

 

The first crack appeared when Adrien discovered Marinette wasn’t venting to Alya. The second, when he deduced she was venting to Nathaniel. The third, when she refused to tell where she’d been going and why. After that, he stopped counting the cracks in his already shattering heart.

He would have gone mad if it wasn’t for Chloé. She distracted him with her Chloéness – always at the centre of attention. Shopping, parties, outings, escapades, movies and all that jazz. She didn’t ask difficult questions, just enjoyed his company. Especially since Nathaniel was never one for public appearances, while Chloé loved to shine.

Yet she grew up to be a rock. The shell that once seemed empty filled with mature, determined and self-aware womanhood. Chloé chose to shine, but deep inside she cared for those she loved. She lent an ear when Adrien needed to talk. She took in his rants, his frustrations and his suffering, without jugging or complain. In that time when he felt everything was falling apart around him, she truly became his friend.

And Marinette refused to believe it to be an honest friendship and friendship only. He couldn’t blame her. In their teenage years Chloé did more than enough to earn Marinette’s distrust. His wife’s possessiveness was also understandable in the face of Chloé’s aggressive attention during their school years. So Adrien started to hide where he was going if he could. On his request Chloé cut down the official occasions not to antagonize Marinette.

But it was too late. The seed was planted. The trust was broken. Every time Adrien couldn’t tell Marinette where had he been, she assumed the worst. Every time Marinette refused to explain her absence, he suspected the same.

Then came the silent days, the rows, the accusations. The hurt. The helplessness.

So his wife abandoned him but Ladybug remained by his side. His only friend who knew the burden of secrets. At that time Chat had been on the verge of a break down. For a couple of months fighting akumas was almost too much for him. All the joy and cheerfulness evaporated from his life leaving an empty, burned-out shell. And he recalled Ladybug was nursing her own wounds back then. They turned to each other despite their masks, became closer friends, sharing similar experience. But they never crossed the line. When he lost Marinette, he simply didn't have any love left.

 

***

 

Adrien sat on the couch over his now cold coffee, the letter creased in his clenched fist. His phone was chiming from time to time with notifications of incoming calls, messages and scheduled appointments. The constant chiming was what finally brought him back to reality. He pulled out his tablet and browsed through all those e-mails, then moved to his calendar. Some of those things were urgent. Some could cost him or other people their jobs or investments. And there was also the matter of plane tickets resting in his bag.

Adrien released a heavy sigh trying to round up his galloping thoughts. He would have to calm down. He would have to prioritize. First – the tickets. He reached to his satchel to take them out when something else fell to the floor. A package, wrapped in a red black-dotted paper, that he had totally forgotten he had prepared as a “welcome” gift for ex-Ladybug.

Ex-Chat Noir now unwrapped the gift himself and ran his fingers over an elegant silver frame which held a picture of two fourteen year old rookies proudly wearing their shiny new miraculouses. Their first “official” photo under the Eiffel Tower.

Adrien’s heart melted at the cheeky gleam in Ladybug’s eyes. He smiled fondly at the grin his younger self was capable of. He had been so happy, almost drunk with the adventure that was opening before him, it was a miracle he didn’t float with excitement above Champ de Mars. That adventure brought them more than they could possibly ask for, but at a price none of them would suspected they would have to pay.

The ex-hero shook his head to dismiss those thoughts. That was a life he left behind yesterday, together with black cat’s miraculous. Adrien brushed his thumb over Ladybug’s radiant figure captured forever in a small photo. She had always been his freedom, his wings, his succor.

And suddenly the queue of priorities was clear as sun on a summer day, with only one task on “to do” list. Adrien quickly typed some e-mails to send, set an auto-reply on his own account and put the tablet down.

His mother had disappeared suddenly, long time ago. Marinette had gradually slipped out of his reach. Then his father- No, that thought was still impossible to entirely fit into his brain. It would probably take years for him to chew it bit by bit. He was barely thirty and already lost too many loved ones. But the love of his life was brought to him again, as if to even a debt for all the sacrifice that miraculous had demanded of him.

Adrien smiled to himself. Maybe black cats weren’t unlucky after all? He was ready to head on Chat Noir’s one last mission.

A quest to get his lucky charm, his love, his Lady back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's all for now. I hope I will be able to post next chapter soon. In the meantime I would love to know what do you think of this story. I appreciate your comments, they help me to improve my writing.


	2. Today

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all your reviews and kudos . This means the world to me. I've worked hard on this story and I hope it shows.   
> So this got much longer than I thought it would be, but I think it's worth it.  
> Please don't forget to let me know, what do you think of this chapter.

'What do you mean she's on vacation?' Adrien shook his head irritably at the quickly reddening face of a bulky man pushing him out of Marinette's office.

'Which part you do not understand, pal?' Pierre seeped through gritted teeth. 'I told you, she's not here! Not that it's any of your business anymore,' the jackass added with a condescending sneer. 'Now get lost or I'll call security!' and for good measure he pushed Adrien out of the room.

The shocked blonde just stood there, door closing back in his face. This search wasn't going as smooth as he thought it would. But again nothing was simple with Marinette. From their first kiss he knew that woman would be the end of him. But he still dove in, heart first, and didn't regret even for a second.

With a sigh Adrien turned around ready to head to his next stop when the door opened again and a young woman slipped to the corridor.

'Hi, Adrien,' she said softly. 'Nice to see you.'

'You too, Camille,' he smiled at the newcomer.

'I'm going to grab a coffee downstairs,' Camille said carefully watching his eyes. 'Maybe you could walk me there?' she suggested.

'Sure.' Adrien hoped that she had more than a stroll on her mind and wasn't disappointed. As soon as they were out of hearing range of anyone eavesdropping behind the office door, she started talking.

'I couldn't help hearing you getting screamed at by Pierre,' she said  compassionately .

'Yeah, you and half of Paris,' Adrien snickered humorlessly.

'You're looking for Marinette?'

'Yes. But Pierre told me she took some time off.' The man shrugged. 'That's all I could get out of him anyway. Maybe you're willing to tell me something more?'

They walked in silence for some time, while Camille seemed to be considering her next words.

'I've always liked you, Adrien,' she said at last. 'You were the best thing that could happen to Marinette. I don't know why it didn't work out between the two of you, but I can tell you that it did something to her. She wasn't the same bubbly Nettie anymore.'

Adrien sighed. Last thing he needed right now was another lecture. But then the woman surprised him.

'Don't get me wrong. I know it must have been really hard for you too. It was pretty obvious that you loved her very much. It showed,' she said with a gentle smile. 'You're a good man, Adrien. I can see it in your eyes. And that's the only reason why I'm telling you all this.'

'Do you know, where she is?' The man replied, hope flickering in his green eyes.

Camille shook her head sadly. 'No. I'm sorry. But I'll tell you everything I know. Which isn't much. Yesterday Marinette called to say that she was going to take all of her annual leave in one go, starting today.'

'But… that's  _ five weeks _ !' Adrien felt an unpleasant surge in his stomach.

'That's why Pierre is so angry. She totally wrecked our schedules but he cannot do anything since she'd been working herself to the bone after you-... you know. She said she needed a distraction.'

That sounded familiar, Adrien thought. He had buried himself in work too, until there was nothing and no one else. That's how he earned those tickets sooner than he thought it would take.

'That's… that's all I know,' the woman concluded. 'She didn't leave any notes or instructions. Just dumped all of her designs in the cloud and disconnected her phone and messenger app.'

'Yeah, already knew about the phone,' Adrien muttered under his breath. He took Camille's hand and squeezed it lightly. 'Thank you,' he said. 'You don't know how important this is to me.'

'Don't mention it.'

Adrien gave her a nod and turned to leave, but she called after him.

'Why are you looking for her, if you don't mind me asking,' she said shyly.

'She's got something that belongs to me,' he murmured barely audibly. 'I need to get it back.'

Camille looked at him confused. 'What's that?'

'Her heart,' Adrien replied with a small smile stepping to the street.

 

***

  
  


Tom & Sabine Boulangerie Patisserie was a very busy place. For years business had been good and lately the bakery became even more popular. Enough to always sport a little queue that turned into an impressive tail outside during lunch hours.

It wasn't lunch time yet, but the bakery was already full of customers waiting to have a taste of the famous Dupain's pastries and bread. Adrien hesitated for a moment but then decided to go through the shop, bypassing the queue on his way to the counter. Since he had started dating Marinette he had always been using the side door and at some point even had his own spare key to the apartment above the bakery. But he felt that the divorce set him back to square one.

As soon as the doorbell stopped ringing Adrien was deafened by a high-pitched squeal and pulled into a tight hug. Slender arms snaked around his waist and he felt the weight of someone's head crushing his sternum.

Time had been kind to Sabine Cheng, although her once dark-blueish hair, so similar to Marinette's silky veil, now reminded him more of Perseids shower, when silver streaks run through midnight sky.

'Adrien! It's so good to see you!' his ex-mother-in-law murmured into his shirt.

Adrien reluctantly returned the hug, 'You too, Sabine,' he said patting her lightly on the shoulder.

Sabine let him out of her embrace, but instead caught his hand and pulled him in the direction of the back door. A young woman, apparently their newest apprentice, was looking at them from the counter with a mixture of curiosity and confusion. The clients shared her sentiment.

'Sophie, the counter is all yours. I'll take my guest upstairs,' she said to the girl. 'Where's Rémy?'

'Tom's showing him the ropes at the back,' Sophie waved in that direction.

Sabine looked around the shop, apparently judging the current length of the line. 'I'll send him to help you in a minute. Me and Tom will be taking our lunch break now.'

Her employee gave a little nod of acknowledgement and turned to the customers while Sabine pushed Adrien out into the little corridor and sent him upstairs. She made a little detour, presumably to inform her husband of their guest, but quickly joined the blonde leading him into their apartment.

Soon Adrien was seated in Dupain-Cheng's living room with a steaming cup of jasmine tea while Sabine was bustling around the little kitchen, preparing something that already smelled divine. Adrien's mouth started watering on its own accord and he chuckled inwardly scolding himself in Plagg's voice, that he was a cat, not some Pavlov's dog. Then he remembered Plagg was gone and nostalgia hit him with full force.

It was even worse that he was at the bakery now, where so many memories peeked at him from every corner. So many moments of warmth, acceptance and love. This was the epitome of home, of family. As far as Adrien was concerned they could put a picture of the Dupain-Chengs next to the meter bar prototype in Sèvres. He honestly couldn't remember when he started to think of Marinette's parents' house as his home, but it was way before he even considered to propose to her. His house hadn't been like this for him for a very long time, despite his father's efforts.

Tom got him out of his reverie as he came by with a plate of pastries, undoubtedly chosen with Adrien's tastes in mind. His ex-father-in-law sat stiffly beside Adrien and was entertaining him with a rather offish small talk concerning approaching election, their new apprentices and business in general, without any mentions of Marinette, Adrien or their marriage whatsoever.

As soon as Sabine plopped onto the sofa with a mug of tea and a plate of hot dumplings, Marinette's father excused himself and after muttering an awkward goodbye he got back downstairs.

'He's mad at me, isn't he?' Adrien asked carefully.

'Don't mind him, dear,' she said with a shrug. 'He's just confused. Tom feels he should choose a side but isn't sure which one.'

'A-a side?' He stuttered, 'like Marinette's or mine?'

'Yes. So far he chose not to be on anyone's side. And he's angry because I disagree with him.'

'So you're on Marinette's side, then?' Adrien said deflating a bit.

Sabine scooted closer and wrapped an arm around him. 'No, hon. I'm on your side,' she said gently. 'I mean for both of you.'

Adrien's eyes widened at the implication of her words. 'Thank you. It's… good to know.'

The woman gave him a little hug before pulling away. 'Oh, I'm so glad you stopped by,' she chirped. 'It's been ages since I last saw you! I've missed you,' she nudged him playfully in the ribs and gasped as if she just remembered something. 'But weren't you supposed to be in Japan?!'

'H-how did you know?' This was a huge surprise for Adrien. He didn't brag about Japan. Only his closest friends knew.

Sabine snorted in mock hurt. 'Well I might be a bit old, but I still know how to type my son-in-law's name into Google once in awhile. Congratulations by the way! That must have been a dream coming true for you to get invited to that Kamioka whatshisname project.'

'It's called Hyper-Kamiokande, but good guess,' Adrien smiled impressed. Not many people could remember things like that, yet his mother-in-law had always been taking interest in his work and she wasn't in the least put off by the fact that it concerned neutrino physics. Plus apparently his name hadn't been the only thing she had googled.

'Say, wasn't there someone who actually won a Nobel for their experiments there?'

'Yes, a few years ago, but I'm sure they won't be the only ones,' His eyes lit up at his favorite subject. 'The things they do there are just unbelievable, the technical capabilities of their detectors… It's quite an honor to get to work with that team,' Adrien decided it would be a good moment to beam with pride, even just a little. It was nice to be appreciated not because of his looks, name or money.

'Oh, I am so proud of you!' Sabine gushed happily. 'I remember how much into all that neutrino stuff you were back at the university. And now you get to work in the best facility in the world!'

'Um… let's not exaggerate. There are a few other quite exciting places out there,' he said amused with her enthusiasm. 'But yeah… it's like a dream coming true.'

'So? When are you leaving us?' the woman asked with a mixture of excitement and sadness. 'I thought you'd be there already.'

'Well… something came up at the last moment and I had to reschedule my journey,' Adrien replied cryptically.

'Oh. I didn't know you can do that with projects of this scope. They must really want you, huh?' Sabine sounded genuinely impressed, still totally oblivious of the reasons to postpone the trip and potential risks of this action towards his career. Adrien thought it would be better if she didn't know.

'Yeah… they've made an exception for me.'

The woman sighed, eyes glazed with memories of their younger years. 'We've always thought you'd want to go to one of those places like CERN or something,' she said helping herself to a dumpling. 'And we even put some money aside in case Marinette wanted to study abroad. But you two seemed to love Paris too much to want to move somewhere else, try other places. I guess that's very patriotic of you,' she added with a giggle and patted Adrien's hand lightly. But then she fixed him with a serious look.

'Now tell me, do you need anything? Or did you just come to say goodbye before setting off to Japan?'

Adrien thought she must have had at least a suspicion as to the goal of his visit, but she was politely waiting for him to get it out himself or back down should he change his mind. Sabine always had been nothing but endlessly kind to him, bathing him in motherly love she knew he craved so much. Even now when he was no longer her daughter's husband, she was still acting like that. He decided it would be disrespectful to lie to her.

'I'm looking for Marinette,' he started. 'And I was hoping you could help me-'

Sabine's face fell and Adrien faltered, suddenly afraid he offended her.

'We ran into each other yesterday and we spent some time together,' he sputtered frantically, trying to suppress his panic. 'And I thought maybe we could… But then she left and… I tried calling but her phone is off… And I was at her office and they told me she had taken her annual leave-'

'Adrien, slow down, dear,' she interrupted him. He felt her hand squeezing his knee and stopped himself.

Taking a deep breath and pressing his palms to his face he asked, much slower this time. 'Do you know where she is? Can you help me contact her?'

'Oh, Adrien,' he heard Sabine gasp. 'I really wish I could help you, dear,' she said, voice cracking. 'She only sent me a text yesterday saying that she was leaving Paris for a few days and that she'd let me know when she gets back.'

'A text,' the blond silently echoed her words. Comprehension seemed to come to him a lot harder than it should.

'Me and Tom aren't exactly on best terms with Marinette right now,' Sabine admitted with a sad sob.

Adrien raised his head to look at her in confusion, while she continued, 'When things got worse between the two of you and the divorce was mentioned, she came to us looking for advice and she didn't like what she heard.'

His heart sank to his stomach. Did Marinette tell her parents about their problems? Was that the reason Tom was so distant towards him?

'Did she-'

'She didn't say anything specific. She kept our conversations very vague, which made it so much more difficult to help her,' Sabine admitted woefully. 'We respect your decision to keep your reasons to yourselves. But I pride myself to be a pretty good judge of characters, never have been wrong. Tom and Marinette know that too. Your break-up was a huge shock to us. It's so unlike you to split over something trivial, and I refuse to believe either of you was capable of doing anything serious enough to justify a divorce.'

Adrien felt cold shivers going down his spine. Did they really misjudged each other so badly? Was their love so fickle that the first serious trial broke their trust? How come they could have put so much confidence in their superhero alter egos and at the same time doubt their civilian selves?

Sabine clearly caught up on his misery. Her sad eyes lightened up with compassion.

'Welcome to life, dear. It's a mess,' she said with uncharacteristic sarcasm. 'Of course you're going to make mistakes. There is no user manual for this.'

He could only snort at that, but he was kind of relieved. Marinette's mother always knew how to make him feel better. She could read him like an open book.

'You want to fix this, don't you?' Sabine asked and he could only nod vigorously in return, swallowing the tears threatening to spill from the corners of his eyes.

'Good,' she said with a satisfied smile. 'You cannot wait for fate to do your job, like Marinette seems to think. You have to act, you have to fight to make it work. If it's not worth the effort it's not going to last,' she said thoughtfully. 'Me and Tom had been through a lot, we had some bad times too. You cannot be married for thirty five years and not argue sometimes.'

'Really?' Adrien considered this. The thought of Dupain-Chengs fighting over anything was inconceivable. 'You've always seemed to be such a like-minded couple.'

'We are, dear. We are,' Sabine agreed. 'But it doesn't come effortlessly. There had been quite a long adjusting phase and even now we happen to have disagreements from time to time. Like over you and Marinette,' she explained. 'But the important thing is we know there's no other person for us and that sooner or later we'll work over this problem.'

Adrien nodded solemnly.

'I'm sure if you put your heart to it you'll find a way to make Marinette come to senses. But promise me one thing,' the woman asked. 'When you talk to her, use other arguments than the fact that you are apparently made for each other. That's cognitive indolence that probably got you into trouble in the first place. Fate and luck are funny concepts, but they don't count in the long run. You can rely on luck when you wish for a brick not dropping on your head, not when you're running a marathon. For that you have to work, you have to prepare, you have to practice. It's-'

Sabine was interrupted by loud vibrations of Adrien's phone fidgeting on the coffee table.

'Read that,' she said immediately. 'Maybe it's from her.'

His hand quickly shot for the phone and in a blink he was reading the notification. Definitely not from Marinette.

 

" _ Remember about our lunch, handsome? xxxxxxxx" _

 

'Shoot, I forgot I have an appointment at lunchtime,' Adrien pinched the bridge of his nose. 'Sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt you.'

'That's okay, hon,' Marinette's mother smiled at him. 'I think I'm done with my rant and I trust you'll know what to do when the time comes.'

She stood up marking the end of their chat. Adrien followed her onto the stairs. Sabine stopped in front of the side door to let him out.

'It was really nice to see you, dear,' she said pulling him into a hug. 'Drop by whenever you're in the neighborhood. And I won't mind if you call or e-mail me from time to time.'

'That I can promise,' Adrien squeezed her arms and slid out of her embrace.

'Don't cut us out, Adrien. Even if things don't work out between the two of you we still think of you as our son, you know. You're a member of this family no matter what. Especially now that your father-'

That was too much for him right now. He could deal with Marinette and Ladybug but not with this.

'Please, I'd rather not talk about that,' he said in a trembling voice.

'Of course. I'm sorry, dear,' Sabine sent him a compassionate look and absent-mindedly reached up to fix his collar. 'Take care of yourself. And good luck with you know what.'

Adrien blinked away the tears, incited by that so motherly gesture, and with one last squeeze of her hand he left the warmth of the bakery. The whirlwind of emotions raging through his heart since yesterday only sped up after this encounter.

 

***

 

'Oh-my-god. I sense a disturbance in the force! You finally got laid!' Chloe exclaimed as soon as she opened the door for him.

'Holy cats! It must be the first time since the D-day!' She babbled giving Adrien a peck on the cheek and letting him inside.

'So tell me, who's the lucky girl! I want all the deets!' She harassed him as they took a seat at the table already set for lunch.

Adrien cringed under the downpour of questions. Chloe always had a sixth sense when it came to him and women. She wasn't interested herself, not for a decade now, but she still somehow could tell if there was a new development in his love life. Like for example now.

The girl trailed off finally noticing his state and gave him a scrutinous look.

'You've seen Marinette,' she stated flatly and then something clicked for her. Her eyes enlarged, brows as high as her bangs and she facepalmed with a groan. 'Please, don't tell me you slept with her.'

Adrien didn't know what to reply or even what to do with his eyes.

'Ade, please. We've been through this, remember?'

He nodded unable to find any words.

'You said it yourself, you didn't want to see her again,' Chloe reminded him, gently stroking his hand. 'You said your heart wouldn't take it. Heck, you've applied for a job in freaking  _ Japan _ to get as far as possible!'

He choked on a sob, when all of those feelings he tried to keep in check overpowered him and washed him away into the sea of despair. The conversation with Sabine and the bakery itself had brought so many emotions from the depths of his memory and it had already put him on the edge. Now all it took was for Chloe to give him a gentle push, even one little finger would do, and he was already drowning.

'Can you tell me what happened?' His friend asked quietly, keeping her voice barely above whisper.

Adrien shook his head, fighting the sudden moist appearing in his eyes.

'Shhhh, honey,' Chloe moved closer and let his head drop to her shoulder. 'It's okay. Everything is going to be okay,' she hushed, rubbing soothing circles on his back.

They stayed like that for a while, Adrien wrapped in Chloe's embrace while she whispered random words of consolation until he finally calmed down.

'Okay. Now you know I gotta ask,' his hostess looked him up and down. 'Did she hurt you? Because if she did I swear to God-'

'No, Chlo. She didn't do anything,' Adrien quickly shook his reeling head, although he knew perfectly well that the state he was currently in was partly Marinette's doings. He also suspected that Chloe realized that too.

'Fine,' she said choosing to let him off the hook. 'I won't mention it again, but if there's anything I can-'

'Thank you, Chloe. I know,' Adrien finally smiled at her and gave her shoulder a little squeeze. 'Now, let's eat!' he changed the subject with a subtlety of a bull in a china shop. 'So, what are you up to these days, Madame Bourgeois-Kutzberg, huh?'

Chloe gave him an unimpressed look of a person well aware that Marinette got his teasing skills in the divorce, but she also couldn't resist the perfect opportunity of starting on her favorite subject. Soon Adrien was drowned in her gleeful babble, infinitely thankful for the distraction. 

The lunch commenced, food disappeared from their plates, coffee mugs were dried and re-filled and finally Chloe's presence seemed to dim, at least temporarily, all the troubles mobbing his front-lobe.

That was until he heard steps in the corridor. Bare feet shuffled sleepily on the soft carpet. A low yawn was stifled as the shuffler reached the living room. Adrien tensed in a second, releasing all the air from his lungs in one go in an attempt not to pounce on the newcomer.

'Holy cats, Ade! Was that a hiss?' Chloe spluttered. 'Relax. It's just Nath. He's been sleeping off all the victory celebrations.' She flashed her husband a pleasant smile and Adrien nodded awkwardly when Nathaniel waved at them on his way to the bathroom, his other hand still over his mouth stifling another yawn.

Chloe dropped her voice to a murmur. 'Just between you and me I was surprised Hawk Moth's defeat would affect him so much. It's been 15 years since we've been akumatized. I barely even remember it.'

Adrien casted a glance at the half asleep redhead now entering Chloe's-  _ their _ bathroom while the girl continued to whisper.

'He needed that, I guess. He said that he finally feels free,' she confessed with a worried frown. 'I bet he's not the only one.'

The retired hero snorted finding it ridiculous, for how long Hawk Moth held Paris and her citizens hostage, including Ladybug and Chat Noir themselves. It had been years of crawling terror. Of immense guilt due to having any kinds of negative emotions. Of fear that one day there's going to be a purple butterfly you won't resist. Of qualms about actions you didn't remember but everybody else could. Of shame and defeat that were someone else's doing but your consequences to live through. It got to many people, although Adrien would have never guessed Nathaniel was one of them. He seemed so level-headed, so strong. Who would have thought that under that façade he still sometimes was a teen scared of Lepidoptera. Apparently not only Ladybug and Chat Noir had been wearing masks for the last fifteen years.

Chloe shot him a baffled look and Adrien stifled the snort into a cough.

Soon the redhead joined them at the table making the conversation awkward on Adrien's end. The two men had very little in common and almost no topics suitable for small talk, not to mention poorly hidden hostility that bloomed between them in the last few months. Adrien decided it was time to leave and taking advantage of the fact that Chloe disappeared in the kitchen he risked a direct question.

'Hey, Nath. Do you happen to know what's up with Marinette?' He hopelessly tried to sound casual so that his former classmate wouldn't notice the tremble in Adrien's voice.

Nathaniel suddenly got very still and gave Adrien a really long and uncomfortable look, as if trying to read the intention behind his query. When he finally lowered his eyes to his plate Adrien felt surprisingly relieved that the inspection was over.

'Nope. I haven't heard from her in a few weeks actually,' the redhead scratched his ginger stubble. 'Why? You wanted something from her?'

Innocent question laced with unspoken threat, if Adrien ever hear one. He decided to go for honesty. 'I'm trying to contact her, but her phone is out of reach.'

Nathaniel paused mid-scratch. 'Hmmm, can't help you with that. She might be in Milan. Last time we talked she was considering a job offer from a company based there.'

Adrien's heart plummeted to his stomach, taking all of his air with it. Milan didn't sound promising, although if he was honest with himself neither would Kamioka if him and Marinette ever got to talk about that.

Nath smirked continuing his chin-scratching, 'Dunno, maybe she's just on vacation. She definitely could use one, you know.'

'Ah, well. Thanks anyway,' the blond replied. 'If you hear from her, can you pass on that I need to talk to her?' he asked, although he was pretty certain that was a totally wrong address for a request like that.

'Why?' The word came out more like a bark. 'Haven't the two of you talked enough already?' Nathaniel said gravely.

'Like you're the one to talk,' Adrien hissed back. 'It's none of your business. I'm just politely asking you for a favor. The reason I need to contact her is… personal, and that's all you need to know.'

Nathaniel apparently decided to still act like a little shit. 'Does Chloe know that you're looking for Marinette?' he asked wryly.

'Fine, forget I asked,' the blond muttered under his breath. 'I'll better be going. Don't want you to use all your spite on me.'

The redhead frowned and then his face relaxed. 'Wait, I'm sorry,' he said reaching for Adrien's hand. The man looked to Nathaniel's fingers gripping his shoulder and turned a questioning stare at him.

Nath returned it with a thoughtful look of his own. He seemed to be considering something before speaking again.

'Here,' he said reaching to his pocket and producing a business card. 'This is the address of my atelier. Please drop by, if you're in neighborhood.'

Adrien could only stare at the card, perplexed. He had absolutely no idea how to react to Nathaniel's invite. They were never close enough even for a friendly chit-chat, and after the mess with Marinette they barely could exchange a few civil sentences without barking. But the man was Chloe's husband so he needed to behave.

'Thanks, Nath,' the blond said carefully taking the card, 'Sure, I can visit you. You know I love your art.' That at least was a half decent truth. Although Adrien couldn't stand Nathaniel's presence and visiting his workshop was the last thing he would do, he really appreciated his colleague's talent.

'It's not about my art. I need to show you something,' the artist replied enigmatically.

'Okay, thanks,' Adrien repeated as he slipped the card into his own pocket. 'I'll be going then,' he motioned to the corridor.

Nathaniel gave him a little nod and sat back at the table to finish his lunch, while Adrien went to the kitchen to say goodbye to Chloe.

 

***

  
  


Alya would know, wouldn't she? She was still close with Marinette but at the same time remained friends with him, even after the divorce. It was worth a shot, but Adrien felt it wasn't a something to talk about over the phone. If he could speak to Alya in person, he would have better chances of convincing her to spill the beans.

That meant a ride to the suburbs, where Nino and Alya moved soon after their wedding. It was cheaper and calmer to live there, especially for a family that was getting bigger. And up until recently also a lot safer akuma-wise, as Hawk Moth targeted the center of the city rather than the outskirts.

Adrien always felt a breath of fresh air whenever he stepped onto the street where Alya and Nino lived. They found their little haven in a green and quiet neighborhood of twin houses. And maybe it was just a false impression, but Adrien thought that theirs was greener but at the same time louder than any other.

'Well, I'll be damn if this is not my favorite daffodil.' Alya exclaimed running to the gate. 'Fancy seeing you here. Shouldn't you be banging neutrinos together at the other side of the globe? Come on give Maman Lahiffe something to smooch,' she giggled grabbing his face and planting a hearty, if somewhat squelchy kiss on his cheek.

'Hey, girl', he said, kissing her back. 'Hey, little dude,' he added with a smile putting a hand on Alya's round belly. 'Gosh, you're huge. How long till I get to meet this guy?'

'Four more weeks,' Alya grunted, wincing and rubbing her back. 'Seriously though, weren't you supposed to be in Japan? Or on one of those board meetings you loathe so much? How are things at Gabriel going by the way?'

'Gabriel is a closed chapter. I sold my shares.'

'Really?' Alya cocked a suspicious brow, but gestured for him to get inside the house. 'I thought you were going to sit on that deal for a bit, see how things will go in Japan, that kind of thing?'

'I sealed the deal this morning.' Adrien admitted rubbing the back of his neck. 'Don't need to think anymore about it.'

Alya looked around checking for any prying ears. When she made sure they were alone, she crossed her arms over her chest and narrowed her eyes.

'Okay, what's up with you and Nettie?' she asked dropping her voice to whisper.

'What?! How do you even-'

No one could outstare Maman Lahiffe. 'Look, pal,' she smirked with satisfaction knowing she hit the mark. 'We've known each other for what – half of our lives? First Nettie calls all hiccupy and snotty and cancels on me because she's leaving. Then you show up when you're supposed to be in Japan for that hyper-something cool project and it also turns out you've sold the shares despite how guilty you supposedly felt about letting your father's legacy go to waste.' She snickered. 'It doesn't exactly take a genius to smell a rat here. And I am a pro. I always smell rat if there is one.'

Adrien could only gape at her, suddenly lost for words. He was saved by the ringtone of Alya's phone.

‘Darn, I have to take that,' his friend sighed shoving him unceremoniously into the living room. 'Make yourself comfortable. I'll be back soon,' she said and disappeared behind the door to her study.

'Uncle Adi?' He felt someone pulling his sleeve down and turned around. Hazelnut curious eyes peeked at him from behind a black mask. Little hair clips shaped like cat ears were pinned to a mass of chestnut curls. At Adrien's feet a five-year-old Kitten Noir, clad in black from head to toe, was nervously wringing the end of her tail and shuffling her little paw-like slippers.

Adrien crouched beside the girl and smiled with his widest smile. His goddaughter was Chat Noir's die-hard fan since she was able to pick her own toys. It may or may not have had something to do with little gifts her very imaginative uncle had been smuggling into her room from time to time, some of those times might or might not have been while properly suited up.

'What's up, Kitten?' he asked sinking to the sofa.

'Did you and aunt Nettie argue a lot?' The little girl shuffled closer to him.

'Sometimes we did. Why do you ask?'

'Maman and Papa sometimes argue too,' she sniffed and wriggled her way to his lap. 'I don't want them to be sad like you and auntie.'

'Oh, Félicie,' Adrien hugged her and rested his chin on top of her head, minding not to disturb the cat ears. 'Adults sometimes disagree and they don't always know the best way to fix things.' He felt his little copycat cuddle closer. 'Don't worry. Your parents love each other very much. They are wiser than to waste what they have.'

Confused hazel eyes looked at him from between her lashes. 'But uncle… you are like the smartest guy I know. Even mum says that, and she knows best.'

'Thanks, I guess?'

'But if you're so smart, why did you and aunt Nettie break up? Don't you love her?'

Adrien felt a sting in his heart, but he made sure not to show it. 'Of course I do,' he replied bopping the little cat nose.

Félicie broke from his hug to look him seriously in the eyes. 'And auntie said she loved you too.'

'She did?' Are you supposed to feel butterflies in your stomach when a five-year-old Kitten Noir tells you your ex-Ladybug said she loved you? Adrien didn't know, but he had to admit it was somewhat pleasant.

'Yeah,' the girl confirmed. 'Last time she was here I heard her and Maman talking. She said you were the love of her life,' she stated matter-of-factly. Then suddenly tears appeared in her eyes, 'Papa says that about Maman too but they still argue,' she sniffed and rubbed her nose with a black paw-glove. 'I don't want Maman and Papa to break up…'

'Look, Kitten,' Adrien hugged her again and rocked her murmuring softly, 'I can see that you're upset. It's okay to be. But people have different opinions from time to time, sometimes they're tired or irritated because of other reasons and they don't control themselves as well as they should. Sometimes they just argue. But I know for a fact, that your parents talk to each other and explain things, and if they do argue, they always make up afterwards and find solutions to their problems.'

'Didn't you?' she asked with a sniff.

'What, Kitten?'

'You and auntie – didn't you talk?'

Adrien sighed heavily. Apparently this kitten was more perceptive than he had been. 'No,' he finally replied. 'We should have, though,' he added not at all convinced if it could help with their case.

Félicie withdrew from his embrace again and put two little paws on his cheeks. 'You should go and talk to auntie then,' she stated solemnly. 'You should tell her that you love her and she could tell you that she loves you back and everything would be all right.'

'That's a wise head you have there, Kitten.' Adrien chuckled messing her hair. If only it was that simple. 'It might be a little bit more complicated than that, but I let you onto a little secret,' he lowered his voice. 'You won't tell anyone?'

Félicie considered his offer. 'Not even Maman?'

'Not even Maman.'

'What about Papa?'

'You can't tell your Papa neither,' the man confirmed trying to keep his expression serious.

'O-kay,' the girl finally huffed rolling her eyes. Her look told him that he apparently drove a hard bargain. She raised one paw in the air and putting the other one on her chest. 'I purrrrromise,' she said drawling the "r" in a long purr that got Adrien to chuckle. He hadn't taught her that trick, it was her own invention that started as soon as she was able to pronounce "r" properly. He absolutely loved it.

'I'm going to find aunt Nettie,' he whispered confidentially, 'and I'm going to talk to her. I'm going to tell her that I love her. And probably a few more things that may help to get it all right. And then I'm going to listen to what she has to say to me and we'll see what happens.'

Félicie immediately perked up. 'I like that plan, uncle Adi. Can I help?'

Of course, like mother like daughter, already a matchmaker at five – Adrien thought snickering inwardly.

'Sure. If I need your help with talking to auntie I'll come straight to you, Kitten.' He messed her hair one more time.

The girl fell quiet and thoughtful for some time. Then she looked at him inquisitively again.

'Do you have kids?'

Ah, another sting. The kid had a talent for guilt trips.

'Félicie, sweetie, you know I don't. If I did, I would definitely bring them here so they could play with my favorite goddaughter.'

'I'm your only goddaughter,' she pointed out good-naturedly.

'True. But it doesn't change the fact that you're my favorite,' he gave her a wink and a lopsided grin.

Félicie smiled back and immediately shot him with another question. 'Why didn't you born children uncle? Don't you like kids?'

'Of course I like kids,' Adrien bopped her nose. 'I like you.'

'That doesn't count. I'm a kitten,' she pointed out.

'Okay, Kitten. Stop grilling your uncle,' Alya said from the doorway. 'It'll be evening soon. You just have enough time to find out what the pattern of your carpet looks like when you put all your toys away,' she said reaching for her feline daughter. 'And then you can take a quick wash before dinner is ready.'

The girl left Adrien's lap with a pout and shuffled to her room.

'Cats hate water,' she grumbled on her way.

'True,' Alya said giving her a gentle push, 'but cats also like to keep themselves very clean.'

'I can't lick myself. Papa says it’s unhygienic and I'm not that flexible anyway. I tried, you know,'

Her mother smiled warmly, 'I'm sure you did, Kitten.'

Adrien listened to their banter until their voices were lost somewhere inside the house. Félicie's presence and her interrogation surprisingly turned out to be just what he needed. He took a deep breath and sank to the sofa, waiting for Alya to return.

Kids. Another sacrifice there. He wanted to have his own family so much. He knew Marinette wanted that too. She had even confessed that she already had the names of their future kids picked up by the time she'd been fifteen while heavily crushing on him. But when they finally started living on their own the subject died. He thought about bringing it up a few times but in the end decided against it. His secret job wasn't exactly safe and what would Marinette do if something happened to him? But he had to be available, he had to be operative for Ladybug. So he decided to wait.

Now he could only fathom what Marinette felt, wanting to have a child like he knew she did, and watching her friends getting pregnant one by one while she put that experience off. Not because she didn't want to be a mother, not because she wasn't ready. But because of the miraculous and the safety of that child  _ in-spe _ . Pregnant Ladybug, on battlefield, fighting a supervillain – that would have been infinitely irresponsible. Still it didn't change the fact that once again miraculouses robbed them of another "what could have been".

Soon Alya returned from Félicie's room.

'I'm sorry. Lately she fires questions like a machine-gun,' she shot him an apologetic smile.

'Very cute question gun you have there, Madame Lahiffe, journalist extraordinaire,' Adrien replied, nudging her lightly.

'Care to join me in the kitchen? I need to get some cooking done,' Alya asked and he was more than happy to oblige.

'Stay for dinner tonight,' she said. 'Please? Nino will be here soon and it's been ages since your last visit. I'm sure he'd love that.'

'I don't want to trouble you,' Adrien shook his head.

'It's no trouble and you know it.'

'Okay,' he agreed, when suddenly an idea hit him. 'But I have two conditions.'

'Have you now?' Alya chuckled raising her brow. 'And what are they?'

'Number one,' Adrien said reaching for Nino's kitchen apron and fastening it behind his back,' you'll let me help you with the dinner. In fact,' he added eyeing the ingredients on the kitchen counter. Casserole wasn't above his cooking abilities. '…you'll let me do most of the cooking while you'll sit here nice and quiet with your feet up and drink your lemonade.'

'Hmmm, I think I can live with that,' she replied fighting hard not to let the amused smirk crawl onto her face. 'What about number two?'

'Number two,' the man hesitated but then pursed his lips and sent her a determined look. 'You'll tell me everything you know about Marinette's plans.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's Note: Please, don't forget to let me know what you think of this chapter. Your comments inspire me!
> 
> People that weren't supposed to be here when I started writing this story: Pierre, Camille, Sophie, Chloe, Nathaniel and Félicie. There was suppose to be one Nino, but he got transferred to the next chapter.
> 
> About goddaughter/godfather thing – I don't know if Félicie would be baptized, but maybe? Alya's family is from Martinique which is mostly Roman Catholic – so they might want that, but Nino's family is from Morocco, which is mostly Muslim. Still, I figured that those titles might as well be honorific as I cannot imagine Nino's BFF not being the best uncle ever.
> 
> Trivia that nobody asked for:  
> Sèvres (suburbs of Paris) is a location of the International Bureau of Weights and Measures, where they keep the prototype of the meter bar (or metre bar like we say in Europe ;) ).
> 
> Kamioka Observatory is a real facility – a neutrino physics laboratory in Japan, and Hyper-Kamiokande is their newest baby, a very large detector currently under construction, that is supposed to start working around 2025.
> 
> CERN stands for The European Organization for Nuclear Research (French: Conseil Européen pour la Recherche Nucléaire). It's a European research organization that operates another large particle physics laboratory. It's situated on the Franco–Swiss border btw.
> 
> You're welcome.


	3. Tomorrow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally chapter 3 is ready! I'm sorry this took so long, but all that time helped me to rethink some of my plans and I think it's for the better.  
> A gigantic thank you to Freedom Shamrock, who provided valuable advice and saved you from quite a few typos and slips. Another thank you goes to Remasa who suggested a few neat one-liners for this chapter.
> 
> Please don't forget to let me know, what you think. This chapter took much time and effort (also on emotional level), so I would greatly appreciate your feedback.

A week had passed and Adrien was still none the wiser. Alya suspected that Nathaniel could be right. Marinette did have plans to apply for a job outside of Paris. But it was unlike her not to let at least one person know where she was. And the last call from Marinette, just before she left, was full of hiccups and sobs, but devoid of any information at all.

In that week she sent a text to Sabine, and a similar one to Alya. She was okay, she was still out of the city, she didn’t know when she’d be back. Her phone was turned off at all times. She wasn’t responding to voice and text messages.

After the first two days and the single message from Marinette Sabine started sending Adrien short texts of consolation, even if she was worried for her daughter herself. Alya got into habit of calling him every evening just to ask if he needed anything, and the unspoken question of his ex-wife’s whereabouts hung between them. Chloe didn’t ask any questions at first, just invited Adrien for lunch or visited him in his place, making sure to see him every day. She witnessed in silence how every few minutes he checked his phone for incoming calls. It made her grit her teeth and after a few days she started nudging him about talking to Nathaniel.

Despite all that silent support he was getting Adrien felt lost and his impatience was growing with each day. He had always been a doer, it went well with the black suit. He did the job that was in front of him and moved onto the next task. Now he felt helpless and that irked him to no end.

Adrien had practically moved into a small café next to his house. A bucket of coffee, his laptop and papers occupied its biggest table at almost all times of the opening hours. The Kamiokande project started and the only way he would keep his chance of participation was to contribute, even from the other side of the globe. He didn’t mind, yet working from his flat was too distracting. Marinette spent just mere few hours there, but somehow the place was already full of her. When he stayed there, he spent most of his time sitting by the window and watching the silent crowds in the streets. The café was way better than that and provided at least an illusion of company.

‘Dude, either you’ve decided to write a novel in Mandarin or that’s some serious physics,’ a cheerful voice over his shoulder interrupted another space-out.

‘It’s both, actually,’ he replied smoothly. ‘A physics book in Mandarin. I like a challenge.’

‘Omigod, Ade…’

‘It’s a joke, Nino,’ he winked and stood up holding out his hand for their customary fist-bump, but his friend pulled him in for a tight hug instead. He gasped at this sudden sign of affection, but Nino didn’t seem to mind the confused glances of other customers. The hug ended with few loud thuds of his fist on Adrien’s back.

‘You looked like you needed it,’ Nino explained.

‘I did,’ the blonde agreed quietly, taking a seat opposite from his friend.

‘Here,’ Nino shuffled through his bag and dropped a thick folder on top of Adrien’s physics pile. ‘Kitten says hi.’

The blonde opened the folder and a collection of drawings spilled over his neutrinos. Each of the drawings, made in patient colorful strokes of a five-year-old hand, included a smiley yellow-haired stick man and a blue-eyed, navy haired plum in a triangle skirt. The corners of his lips quirked in a small smile.

‘We call it the Adrinette period,’ Nino proudly announced. ‘It’s a nice change from all those black cats she’s been drawing lately. You know you can’t buy only black crayon? Every time she ran out of we had to buy a whole new set.’

‘Looks like you already have enough for an exhibition,’ Adrien quipped.

‘Probably. She even drew a few wedding ones and at least one with a kid, though Alya decided to spare you. But there were really good.’

‘I’m sure they were,’ the physicist tried to suppress the burst of disappointment. He was hoping for a happy ending with Marinette, but it seemed that only his doodle version got lucky.

Nino sighed. ‘The truth is, we’ve got a lot more at home. Kitten begged me to take these with me. She just won’t stop drawing the two of you since your last visit. She got into her head this can help you.’

This time Adrien smiled warmly. ‘This actually made me feel better,’ he admitted. ‘Please, thank Félicie from me. I love her drawings.’

‘How’s it going, my man?’ his friend asked hesitantly. ‘Still nothing?

‘Nope.’ Adrien shook his head. ‘Not a squeak.’

‘Did you ask Dupain-Chengs?’

‘They just get texts like “I’m okay. Not coming back yet”,’ the blonde replied with a shrug.

‘Alya gets those too and nothing more. She’s really worried. It’s not safe for her this close to- eh…‘ Nino trailed off, eyes trained on the shop window on the opposite side of the street.

‘Have you decided on the name yet?’ Adrien chose to change the subject.

‘Nuh-uh. We have a few but we’d like to meet him properly before we know who he is.’

‘Really?’

‘Yeah,’ Nino rubbed the bridge of his nose. ‘Worked like a charm with Félicie, didn’t it?’

‘True,’ Adrien ran his fingers over the drawings. ‘She’s a little gem.’

‘What about Kamioka,’ Nino’s gaze went to the drawings and then rested on the heap of unreadable prints full of physics. ‘I see they haven’t canceled on you.’

‘No. I thought they would, but apparently they were impressed with my resume and decided they could wait a little longer. They chalked it up to “family emergency”,’ Adrien pointed to the pile closest to him. ‘I’m doing some on-line assignments for now. But they can’t wait forever.’

‘How long, then?’

‘A month at most and then either I’m there or I’m out,’ the blonde admitted quietly.

At that point the waiter came with Nino’s order and a refill for both of them causing an inevitable lull in conversation. After a while Adrien broke the silence remembering his last talk with Félicie.

‘Are you and Al okay?’ he asked.

‘Same as always, I guess,’ Nino shrugged. ‘Félicie told you we’ve been fighting, right?’

‘She’s afraid you’re going to split up,’ Adrien recalled his goddaughter’s worries.

‘She’s far more perceptive than we gave her credit for. I’ll talk to her.’

‘Why are you and Alya fighting?’ his friend inquired.

‘Oh, you know,’ the man waved his hand dismissively. ‘Our usual topic.’

Adrien raised his brows. ‘The akuma book?’

‘The akuma book,’ Nino admitted releasing a resigned puff and taking his glasses off. ‘Only now it’s gotten far worse.’

‘How so?’

‘Well, she says she has a knife on her throat now that Hawk Moth is gone. Plenty of people are going to try and rise to occasion and she could be one of them if not for the-‘

‘-little dude,’ Adrien finished. ‘God, it must be killing her.’

‘Pretty much,’ his friend agreed. ‘And on top of that the heroes are gone.’

‘What?’

‘Haven’t you heard?’ Surprise laced Nino’s voice but then he looked at Adrien’s crumpled clothes, red, tired eyes and a ton of physics topped on the table. ‘On second thought, don’t answer that,’ he chuckled humorlessly. ‘LB and Chat are gone. No one has seen them in a week. That’s the longest they’ve been gone. Rumor has it, they are not coming back.’

‘Ah. Is that a bad thing?’

‘For me and Félicie? Not at all. For Alya’s blog and her book though…’

At that precise moment both phones deposited on the table lightened up with an incoming notifications.

Adrien’s hand shot almost involuntarily to his device. He clutched it like a hawk and unlocked it momentarily, Nino’s presence all but forgotten.

[ChloeBK 14:32] [Nath says Marinette is back]

[ChloeBK 14:33] [Why haven’t you talked to him?]

 

Adrien’s stomach did a little somersault at the first message, and then plummeted down at the second one. Why was Chloe so set on him talking to Nath? She must have known he couldn’t stand the man and only tolerated him because of her.

Nino stared at him with poorly hidden amusement.

‘What?’

‘Judging by the way you’ve gone all green I don’t need to hide my texts,’ his friend replied showing him his own phone.

[♡Al♡ 14:31] [Red alert, M in town]

[♡Al♡ 14:32] [Make sure A doesn't flip out]

 

‘Right,’ Adrien ran his fingers through his blond locks, making them even more messy. ‘Right, right, right,’ he repeated. In one effective motion he scooped Félicie’s drawings into their folder, then with another one he swiped his own papers from the table and stuffed them into his bag together with his computer.

Nino stared in surprise. ‘Wait, where are you going?’ He didn’t like the restless look in his friend’s eyes.

‘I… I don’t know,’ Adrien paused his frantic retreat, as if just remembering Nino was still there. ‘I just need to do something, anything really.’

‘Like what?’

‘I don’t really know.’ The physicist slumped back to his seat.

Nino narrowed his eyes. ‘Why now, Adrien?’

‘What?’

His friend sighed, not really eager to get this out, but determined to get to the bottom of Adrien’s strange behavior. ‘You divorced some time ago. You were both keeping your distance. You were both hurting. Is this some freak-out because of Japan? You’re not gonna be there forever, right? What changed? Why now?’

‘I… I found out about something,’ Adrien admitted after a moment of hesitation. ‘Something about Marinette that I hadn’t known.’

‘Does it really make a difference? After all these years?’

Adrien considered this question. How much could he let on? Not much, but he still needed to be honest, with himself too. ‘No.’

‘But?’

‘But it made me rethink and realize a few things.’

‘And?’ Nino was as patient as a rock.

‘And I don’t want to live without her,’ Adrien mumbled barely audibly, unable to find better words.

‘Wow, that sounds ominous,’ his friend frowned, worry filling his eyes.

‘N-not like that, god no!’ The blonde gasped in shock. ‘I just- I want to try and get her back.’

‘What makes you think she’d want that?’

‘I… I don’t know. But I didn’t exactly get a chance to ask, did I?’ Adrien suddenly started to feel very uncomfortable under the fire of questions. Nino could give Félicie a run for her money.

‘And now she’s back, so there’s your chance?’

‘If she wants to talk, yes.’

Nino sighed and shook his head. ‘Good luck then. I hope you’ve thought it through.’ He fixed Adrien with a thoughtful stare. ‘Geez, Ade. Did it even cross your mind that what you’ve learnt might be the reason she ran away?’

 

***

## 

Of course Adrien hadn’t thought it through. It was quite a shock to realize that. He was so focused on contacting Marinette after his first impulse to get her back that he omitted to ponder on that particular topic. He was vaguely aware that “I love you” or “I’m sorry” wouldn’t solve anything. Not after what had happened between them. If this would be enough, Marinette wouldn’t have left him that first day after they revealed themselves.

Nino was right, he needed to gather his wits and focus not only on finding her, but on the next steps – getting her to talk and the message he wanted to deliver. Assuming he would succeed in contacting her, what would he say? What would he want? Did he even know that? Kamioka was still on the table, both literally and metaphorically. Maybe Milan was there too? Or any other possibility. What did he want? What was he willing to sacrifice to get a chance with her? What would she want? He needed to figure this out.

There was also a question of Marinette’s escape. He didn’t hesitate to call it that. Nino was right. She ran away. But why? Was she running from him or from something else? Where would he even begin looking for those answers?

The whirlwind of questions and conclusions ran through his troubled head on his way home and turned out to be a constant companion for the next few days.

Despite Nino’s wishes luck wasn’t on his side. Though Marinette was back, she still kept silent. None of his messages earned a reply. None of his friends had any new information for him. The few times Adrien risked checking at her place, “accidentally” leading his jog route near her building, he came back empty-handed. The windows were dark, the curtains motionless, her car was nowhere in sight. It was as if his ex-wife moved into another dimension. She was in the same city, she walked the same streets, she talked to the same people, yet there was a barrier that prevented him from finding her. And it was slowly driving him crazy.

Adrien did his best to put a lid on his simmering temper and reduce the flame. His anger was brewing slowly over the course of the past few days. Pressure, disorientation, hurt, hope, helplessness added to the mix. He had no idea there was so much of it at this point, though it was apparently obvious for any observer.

His breaking point turned out to be finding out about Marinette’s meeting with Nathaniel.

‘She was here?! When?!’ He just couldn’t keep his voice down, and frankly he didn’t care.

‘Adrien Agreste, calm down this minute or you’ll feel my wrath!’ Chloe yelled back at him shooting him with a warning glare. She pushed him to the couch still piercing him with her icy blue eyes. ‘Shut up and sit,’ she commanded in a voice intolerant of disobedience.

‘She was here yesterday, visiting Nath,’ the girl said after he complied to her wishes. ‘And before you ask, we just exchanged greetings. She was already leaving when I got here and didn’t look eager to talk to me. Which frankly isn’t really a surprise, right?’

Adrien’s hands clenched to fists, his knuckles white. He was so tired of this cat and mouse game. Maybe he should just take the hint. As usual Chloe could read him like an open book.

‘Why are you doing this to yourself, Ade?’ she asked. ‘Isn’t it obvious, she just doesn’t want to see you?’

Valid questions. Ones he’d been asking himself a lot lately. But he didn’t come up with any answers, so instead he replied with a question of his own. ‘Did you ask her to contact me?’

‘I was going to, but there was no need for that.’ Chloe hesitated, ‘she told me Nath, her parents and Alya already passed on your request.’

Adrien felt a sharp pain in his chest. So she knew. Well, she must have by now anyway, since he left a few dozen texts and voicemails on her mobile. But it was different being aware that those messages, as well as pending requests left with other people had been just flying there and waiting, and quite another to hear out loud that Marinette got at least some of them, if not all, and chose to do nothing about them. He felt the anger trying to rear its ugly head, but suppressed it once more. Instead he decided to pry for more information. Chloe was already vexed, he might as well get through with it.

‘How was she? How did she look?’ he asked and shuddered as his friend released an annoyed hiss.

‘Not good,’ she admitted after a while, but there was no trace of emotion in her voice. ‘Tired, pale, thin.’

What did that even mean? Did he do this to her? Why did the world throw so many questions at him but provided next to no answers or those answers he got only led to more questions? Speaking of questions, there was one that was casting a long shadow over his quest.

‘Chlo, do you mind if I ask you something?’

She just rolled her eyes, ‘Haven’t you asked plenty already? But sure, shoot.’

He took a deep breath. Maybe this was a terrible idea but he needed to know of her opinion. ‘Do you think Nath and Marinette… that they-‘ No. He said it once to Marinette in anger and it still hurt too much to say it again. But Chloe of course was quick and knew him well.

‘Do they have an affair?’ she finished for him.

Adrien gulped and nodded, waiting for her answer. He imagined this moment many times, trying to gather his courage, but he didn’t expect for her to laugh at him.

‘Pffft! Adi-honey, please,’ she chuckled. ‘You're reading too much in this open marriage thing me and Nath have. Sure we have our little adventures but Nathaniel isn't like that. It would be disrespectful to Marinette and to you. And by extension to me too.’

Adrien never considered it like that. He was too jealous of the attention Nath was getting to even think about this perspective.

‘I thought you didn’t like her,’ he said to cover his embarrassment.

‘And I don’t,’ Chloe replied simply. ‘But that doesn’t mean I don’t respect her. When you were together – before it all went down the drain I mean – she made you really happy and I was grateful for that.’ The blonde sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. ‘I may not especially like Marinette, and I may not agree with some of her decisions,’ she admitted, ‘but she’s a good person. Nath wouldn’t have been friends with her if she wasn’t and I trust Nath’s judgment when it comes to people.’

Adrien didn’t even notice when he hid his face in his hands trying to stop the frustrated groan lurking at the back of his throat. Either he had been very, very blind, or Chloe was stupid and naïve to trust Nath. And Adrien knew Chloe wasn’t short on brains.

‘I know you hate him, but he is a good guy, Adrien,’ she continued, unaware of his inner turmoil. ‘And you really should talk to him first before you run after your precious princess. That’s the last time I will ever mention it though.’

 

***

 

Two weeks after Ladybug and Chat Noir had given up their miraculouses Adrien was sitting in yet another café near Montparnasse instead of his own home and trying to decide if it was finally the time to buy the ticket to Tokyo. As a bunch of people had pointed out at various times of his life, he was undoubtedly a smart man. He didn’t consider himself a masochist nor a martyr. If Marinette didn’t want to talk to him, so be it.  And throwing the last few years of his career out of the window because of one stubborn woman would be really dumb.

His eyes tracked the path of the cursor making eights on the screen over the order button. There was still that little voice at the back of his head whispering to try again, to do something more. Adrien spent the last hour trying to clamor it down with all the excuses he could think of. He got stuck in some kind of stalemate, knowing perfectly well he had all the reasons to move on, but feeling that it wasn’t the right thing to do. He settled on waiting for Nino, making a promise to himself to make the final decision when his friend gets there with whatever news he got.

He regretted it as soon as Nino arrived and dropped it all on him.

‘Sorry, man,’ his friend hid behind his gigantic cup of tea, as if he wanted to shield himself from Adrien, which wasn’t a good sign. ‘She visited us once, yesterday, brought a gift for Félicie, but as soon as Kitten presented her with her newest masterpiece of Adrinette period, Nettie went nuts,’ he waved a hand as if that could illustrate how much nuts she went and spilled some of the tea onto the table. He grabbed some napkins and frantically dabbed them at the brown puddle. ‘She just fled like she’d been set on fire, and then texted a short apology with a poor excuse.’

‘Those drawings weren’t that awful,’ Adrien muttered under his breath, because really, what more evidence did he need to finally make a decision.

‘Careful, dude,’ Nino chuckled waving a warning finger at him, a playful gleam lighting his eyes for a second, ‘you’re talking about our next Monnet!’

‘My bad,’ Adrien put a hand on his chest. ‘But please continue.’

‘Oh, yeah. Well, Alya tried calling her afterwards and Nettie wouldn’t respond,’ his friend shrugged. ‘But you know how pregnant Alya is even worse than she usually is, right? She lost her temper pretty quickly and decided to talk to Nettie in person. So she drove to her apartment and found it empty and available to let,’ Nino concluded slightly out of breath.

‘What?’

‘Nettie moved out in secret, dude,’ Nino frowned. He lowered his voice to whisper, as if afraid how his friend would react to such news. ‘And no one, not even Sabine, knows where she lives now.’

Adrien whistled, releasing the breath he’d been holding. What a mess.

‘If I hadn’t known her,’ Nino reluctantly continued, ‘I would have thought she’s punishing us for talking to you.’

‘Well, you and Alya don’t have to worry about it anymore,’ Adrien replied calmly. It was time to stop this madness on both sides of the barricade.

‘What do you mean?’

‘This actually helped me reach a decision,’ the physicist got back to his computer. ‘I’ll stop, whatever this is.’

Nino watched the cursor going back to order button. ‘It’s time for plan J,’ the blonde smiled bitterly.

‘Good plan,’ his friend nodded encouragingly.

Just as Adrien began finalizing the order they were both startled by a loud yelp and a thud behind them. They immediately looked down.

Nathaniel was sprawled on the floor, his legs tangled with Nino’s messenger bag.

‘Um, sorry!’ he mumbled trying to sort out his limbs.

Nino reached for his bag while Adrien pulled the redhead up. ‘Are you okay, Nath?’ he asked.

‘Thanks,’ their colleague said pushing his long bangs out of his eyes. ‘Oh, I’m so glad I found you guys,’ he said, panting heavily. He bent down and put his hands on his knees trying to regain his breath.

Nino and Adrien glanced at each other. The latter nodded, inviting his friend to take the lead. Nath wasn’t his favorite person after all.

‘Nath?’ Nino asked carefully. ‘What are you doing here?’

‘Long story.’

‘We have time,’ Adrien interjected, feeling his patience growing thin.

‘Well, if you insist,’ Nathaniel straightened up to meet his gaze. ‘Chloe told me you’ll be having lunch in the neighborhood.’

‘So?’

‘So I might have been running for the last hour from one café to the next one hoping I would find you,’ the artist admitted. ‘And I did,’ he smirked proudly.

‘You did,’ Adrien shrugged while Nino stood at his side baffled and silent. ‘And?’

‘What?’

‘Why were you looking for me?’ By that point the blonde already felt the anger bubbling again, heading for the surface.

‘Oh,’ Nathaniel smoothed his features into a friendly smile, one Adrien hadn’t seen directed at him for a very long time. ‘I need you to come to my atelier and since it’s in this neighborhood I thought maybe you could spare me a few minutes. I really think you should see something,’ he explained and it sounded almost desperate.

Adrien and Nino exchanged confused looks. Nino followed his with a frown of “you-sure-you’re-okay-with-that?” one, which Adrien returned with “whatever-let’s-get-it-over-with”. Nino shrugged and stood up.

‘Well, I’d love to see your atelier, Nath, but I have to be going back to work,’ he said picking up his stuff. ‘Maybe some other time? See you, guys!’

Adrien closed his laptop and followed Nathaniel into an unknown destination. On the screen the cursor blinked and froze over the order button, just before the device went to sleep mode.

 

***

 

The atelier was a little bit of a shock for Adrien. He imagined spacious but comfy apartment in avant-garde building, with large windows and a magnificent, inspiring view. He didn’t expect a nondescript modern architecture, sky-lights, glass and concrete nor the building opposite so close, he could read the titles of the books on the shelves of the apartment on the other side of the narrow street.

The space looked empty except for a few plush armchairs and a cupboard, a few boxes of paints and a kitchen full of stained walls. One wall was dedicated solely to Nathaniel’s digital equipment and this gave the impression of the most lived-in part of the place.

‘Tea? Coffee?’ Nathaniel kicked the door closed behind them and led Adrien to the kitchen space.

‘Thanks, but I don’t exactly have much time,’ the guest replied inspecting the room suspiciously. He decided just this once to leave his hostility on the doorstep and listen to Chloe’s advice, but that didn’t mean he was going to socialize here.

‘Okay,’ Nath shrugged. ‘I’m not good at small talk anyway, so I’ll cut straight to the chase. Why are you looking for Marinette?’ The redhead asked keeping Adrien’s gaze.

‘No offence Nath, but like I said before it’s none of your business.’

‘You’re right. It’s not my business but I’m still concerned,’ Nathaniel said pouring himself a glass of water. ‘Mari is my friend and I don’t want her to get hurt again.’

‘Why would I hurt her?!’ Adrien snarled, but Nathaniel just gave him a pointed look. The blonde caught himself in time to stop another outburst. He exhaled loudly trying to get rid of the hostility that resurfaced after his host voiced his concern. ‘Do you really think I’d go to all this trouble, postpone my journey to Japan and alarm her parents and her friends just so I could find her and torment her? Gosh you really have a low opinion of me.’ He said bitterly.

‘I believe you,’ Nath replied quietly, pursing his lips. ‘Come on,’ he said after a moment of hesitation. ‘I really wanted to show you something.’

He moved some frames and empty canvases aside and uncovered a dusty door leading to a narrow dark walk-in closet. When they entered Adrien realized it wasn’t a closet at all, it was an enfilade. He could see through the door at the opposite wall that there were at least two more rooms there. He only thought this was a closet because of tall shelves that filled all the space between doors. They were full of paintings of various sizes, suspended on some sort of racks or hangers.

Nathaniel led him to the last and the biggest room at the end of the enfilade. He pulled the curtains of the floor to ceiling window aside and the space was flooded with light. Apparently this was where he actually painted. There were a few easels and a table with some fruits in a bowl, a sofa, possibly for when he needed a model. But the main filler were sheets. Huge, white, dusty sheets that covered almost everything in here.

It took Adrien a moment to recognize the shapes under those covers. Undoubtedly there were more canvases underneath. Almost all were propped against the wall opposite from window. The most colorful wall Adrien had ever seen inside of a building. But that wasn’t a mural or a graffiti on that wall. It looked more like a paintball target, with large splotches of paint congealed in various stages of drip, with wide smudges of color splayed there with hands, fists or large brushes. It was chaotic, full of different shades and irregular shapes, that didn’t merge into anything in particular. Still the overall impression was extremely disturbing for some obscure reason.

Adrien brushed that thought off and concentrated on Nathaniel.

‘Did Marinette ever tell you why she visited me here?’ the artist asked, staring out of the window.

‘She told me you were talking art and sometimes you wanted her advice or try out new things,’ Adrien cringed slightly at that last remark. It sounded as suggestive as what he thought they might have been doing here.

Nathaniel looked surprised. ‘She didn’t tell you she started to paint?’

‘No…’ That was something new. Marinette drew a lot. This was an inherent part of her job as a designer. She doodled too, though that was mostly during their school years. But Adrien had never seen her with a brush.

‘I don’t think it’s a coincidence, but she started around the same time you guys got married,’ the redhead wrinkled his nose. ‘And I reckon it was more a way of relieving tension than anything else.’

Nathaniel led him to the corner and started to uncover the canvases. Adrien recognized the style at once. These were Marinette’s doings. The curves, the shadows, the color palette. Her style as a designer was very distinctive. This was what landed her the current job so early in her career. And that style Adrien now saw reflected in those disconcerting shapes captured between the frames. Here it was devoid of the familiar gentleness, warmth and light. Stripped of her bubbly passion it seemed bare, ugly, twisted, like in distorting mirror. Brutal. Aggressive. Hurtful.

‘She came here to vent,’ Nathaniel explained uncovering painting after painting and propping them against the remaining walls. ‘Sometimes she just sat here and cried. Sometimes she painted. Sometimes she threw things.’ He motioned to the colorful wall.

Adrien turned to the canvases now undressed from their sheets and exposed to the merciless light of the room.

First frame was filled with black, red and blue. Blurred lines, as if painted outside in the rain, fading into murk creeping from the corners. Just a suggestion of Ladybug’s reflected face. It left Adrien’s chest hollow and aching. The second canvas sent shivers down his spine. Two green eyes, splashes of emerald glared at him from a marine blue abyss. On the third painting a similar set of eyes, but hidden behind a black mask dissolved into darkness of a charcoal vortex that to him bore every resemblance of the entrance to hell.

‘When she told me you were breaking up I put two and two together.’ Nathaniel’s voice seemed to be coming from a world next door. Adrien had to concentrate to make out his words over the screams of the paintings. Each was worse than the previous one – filled with more despair, more rage, more helplessness.

Nath put a hand on Adrien’s shoulder and suddenly the screaming stopped. ‘This is one of the last she made, right after the divorce,’ he motioned to a frame that above the dim tones of green, red, black, blue and yellow, a recurring theme to all of those works, didn’t scream nor shriek, but only whispered of failure, of loneliness, of sorrow so ingrained into one’s heart that it ripped it from inside.

‘She asked me to burn all of them,’ Nathaniel concluded timidly, as if afraid to disturb the poignant song of the paintings. ‘And I have burned those that were the most gloomy and depressing,’ he shuddered at the memory. ‘To be honest I couldn’t stand them being here, even covered with heavy tarpaulin. I don’t know why I saved these few. But I hope I did the right thing if showing them to you might make a difference.’

He led the physicist towards the last covered shape, that clearly stood apart from the earlier ones. Nathaniel unwrapped it carefully and Adrien didn’t need to check for signature to recognize his hand. This lacked Marinette’s smooth lines, a display of Nath’s sharp strokes, but similarly dark and heart wrenching.

Purple mask glowing over a demon’s eyes. Nine circles of Inferno smoldering in the background with rich shades of crimson.

‘Neither of you ever got akumatized,’ Nathaniel continued, voice harsh and wet with swallowed tears. ‘I have. I know intimately and personally how does it feel to encounter the butterfly and Hawk Moth. I know fear and despair.’

He walked over to Marinette’s canvases again. ‘It looks exactly like  _ that _ .’

He pointed to the frame where splotches of yellow, green and black, that could only be a distorted version of Adrien dissolved into the void. ‘We all cradle our own ghosts, Chat Noir. But it seems to me that  _ hers _ were really scary.’

At once Adrien covered with cold sweat. It was like a slap across his cheek. He gaped at Nathaniel with eyes wide opened and shock unable to disguise. ‘So she told you,’ he croaked.

Nathaniel’s face was empty of triumphant smile Adrien was expecting to see. It was sad, serious and tense. 

‘No,’ he said. ‘Up until a second ago it was only a suspicion. But I’m pretty good at understanding art.’ He took a deep breath. ‘I don’t know what had happened between you two. All I know that  _ this _ is what was inside her, what she needed out. I doubt that it was you who did this to her, but please, whatever you’re planning, don’t make it happen again.’

With that Nathaniel nodded and left him alone.

Adrien took some time to watch all of Marinette’s paintings closely, even though with each look he felt cold steel piercing through him. He took it all – all of her pain, despair and helplessness to remember and understand. All this was dwelling under the bubbly façade of his lovely wife, as well as under the brave and unbreakable mask of Ladybug. While he hadn’t known, hadn’t noticed anything for  _ fifteen years _ . When under the rising pressure of adult life it started leaking out he wasn’t there for her. Nathaniel was. And instead of inquiring or accepting Adrien accused her of infidelity.

God, she must have been scared and overwhelmed with responsibility. It was  _ her  _ Charm that was required to defeat an Akuma, it was  _ her _ power to cleanse the butterfly, it was  _ her _ Cure to bring everything to order. Had anyone ever though what that kind of responsibility did to a person? How lonely she must have felt. How irreplaceable.

Ladybug always scolded Chat when he took the blows for her and he always brushed her off countering that he was her shield and that she should be the one still standing to take the akuma out.  _ He  _ planted those thoughts in her himself.  _ He _ repeatedly told her she was the important one.  _ He _ put that weight on her shoulders.

Adrien knew he deserved every punch, every stab, every twist of stomach that he received looking at those paintings. Now he knew that he desperately needed to find her, to hold her and soothe her, to chase all of that darkness away. But he already had tried every way he could think of, except one.

It was time to do things Chat’s way.

‘Nathaniel!’ he called into the apartment. ‘I need your help.’

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again let me remind you, that feedback is really important to me. I'd appreciate your comments, if there's anything you'd like to share after reading this chapter.
> 
> It is now quite obvious that what was supposed to be a three-chapter fic, is not finished yet. There's going to be one more chapter, half of which is written at the moment. But as I have other obligations, I can't promise to post it soon. I'll do what I can to update within a month. 
> 
> Check out my other stories and visit me on [tumblr](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/perditaalottachocolate-blog). I tend to post sneak peeks of the stories I'm working on and share mostly miraculous content.


	4. The Day After Tomorrow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all your support for this story, for comments, kudos, bookmarks. I appreciate it all greatly!  
> I'm sorry this took so long, but now the last chapter is here for you to enjoy the closure. 
> 
> I have been asked about music that would fit this fic, and as it happens I have a playlist I've been listening to while writing. I think it goes well with this story (you can find it here on [spotify](https://open.spotify.com/user/perditax-pl/playlist/3861xk9PiR4vYcQXVTOrPb) or on [youtube](https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL4b1lGCx86z0V8logaTYFektijMAnsGNn))
> 
> Once again thanks to AmyNChan for letting me write the continuation of her story, a big thank you to Remasa for very useful comments and her patient presence while I fought with this, and also to Freedom Shamrock for her advice.
> 
> Now without further ado - here's the rest of the story. Don't forget to let me know, how you liked it!
> 
> EDIT: Now with art from the amazing Auroralynne!

 

‘Uncle Adi! Uncle Adi! You won’t’ believe this!’ Kitten Noir started jumping up and down as soon as she saw Adrien down the street. ‘Chat Noir is back!’

‘He is?’ Adrien asked allowing himself a confused frown while he took his goddaughter’s hand.

‘Yes! It’s all over Maman’s Ladyblog! Look, look, look!’ she cried dragging him to Alya’s office.

‘Morning, Sunshine!’ his friend greeted him from behind her desk. ‘Have you heard about the Chat Noir graffiti? Since early morning people have been sending photos of all the places it has been spotted. For now we have… oh, more than 12 different locations all over Paris.’

‘I don’t understand.’ Adrien internally congratulated himself on his carefully blank mildly interested face. It was a face he inherited together with his last name, but he barely found it useful up until now.

‘There are a few hypotheses, but personally, I think he’s looking for Ladybug,’ Alya tapped her chin thoughtfully.

‘He is?’

‘Of course. Those pics mostly match the spots where the two of them were seen most often. They are probably significant to their relationship. There are a few odd places like that cute Parc de Buttes Chaumont, where you proposed to Marinette, or other locations hitherto unassociated with Ladynoir, but the pattern is very clear.’ Alya turned the screen so that Adrien and Félicie could see it too. ‘Trocadéro, Eiffel Tower, Louvre, Hôtel de Ville, Parc des Princes.’

The three of them stared at the pictures for a moment, mother and daughter vibrant with excitation while Adrien was doing his best to fight off a content smile. He was actually counting on social media - they would help to bring attention to his little stunt.

Alya ran her fingers over the keys and a map appeared with a lot of black dots. ‘I must say this is an idea of a genius, and look what I got when I pinned those locations on a map.'

Adrien and Félicie leaned in to take a closer look at the dots randomly scattered throughout the city.

‘Is it… a snail?’ Kitten Noir ventured, her eyes watery from squinting.

‘A shoe? A vase?’ Adrien guessed, amused to be able to tease Alya for a change.

‘It’s a heart, you doofus!’

‘Oh, Maman Lahiffe, journalist extraordinaire,’ the blond chuckled. ‘I have no doubt that you’re an expert on Ladybug and Chat Noir but you should get some quick lessons in geometry. This certainly is not a heart!’ After all, Adrien should know best. There definitely was no geometrical pattern to the little signs he had put up last night with Nathaniel’s help.

‘Well…’ Alya hesitated. ‘If you tilt your head this way and do a little squint it kind of looks like a heart,’ she finally replied.

‘Uhuh, like I am Ladybug,’ he laughed turning around and showing a red mask covering his eyes, that his goddaughter secretly slipped into his hand just a moment ago.

‘You two are just impossible!’ Alya hit him on the shoulder, but then turned to the screen thoughtfully. ‘I hope she gets the message,’ she said absentmindedly.

Me too, Adrien thought. Me too.

 

***

 

The good people of Paris kept sending the locations until the map was mostly complete. They wouldn’t find all of them. Some were situated in places accessible only to people with superpowers, or very adept climbers. Some were hidden in abandoned places. Some were private property. But Adrien knew if she wanted, Ladybug would reach them all. She always liked a challenge and he was counting on her taking the bait.

So he waited. And waited. And waited.

After the first day Adrien went to check on some of the less obvious locations, but the little messages he left there were still intact. Still, he was confident this would work. That’s really why he started checking, in hope he would find her there. There was also a possibility that she’d settle for replying in kind, with a letter or other message, but Marinette still kept silent.

He started imagining how it would be if they finally met. What she could  say, how he would reply. Would there be a happy ending? Would they say “I love you?" More than anything, Adrien  wanted to stay realistic. Marinette was silent for so long that a mere “I love you” wasn't going to mend anything. And he had to admit that in his current state, he wouldn’t have reacted well to that line should he be on the receiving end. He walked that thin line between hope and disappointment, getting more and more tired with every passing day. He could barely sleep, afraid he would somehow miss a message or signal from her.

After four days, when Ladynoir hysteria started to die out, he discovered the first message had disappeared. After six days more letters got collected but nothing was left in their place. By the seventh day they were all gone.

That day Adrien got back to his apartment with a light heart. Finally an idea that worked. Finally he managed to deliver a message more substantial than “We need to talk.” Somehow this made him feel better than in days and the tension he had been carrying on his back had finally dissolved, leaving exhaustion in its wake.

He all but crashed onto his couch and as tired dreamless slumber claimed him, his last thoughts went to Marinette reading his letters.

 

***

 

He didn’t know for how long he slept. It felt like minutes, but it had to be hours. Adrien remembered falling asleep in the afternoon, but now it was clearly nearing noon if the light that shone onto his face through the half closed curtains was anything to go by. He must have slept for something like 20 hours!

The sound of key in the door lock startled him awake. Someone entered but he couldn’t see them as he still kept his eyes closed, being blinded by the sunlight. He didn’t move, just listened to light steps approaching him. Only Chloe had the keys to his apartment, but it couldn’t have been her. She left for her vacation the day before.

And then the unmistakable scent reached him. Lavender, vanilla and lemongrass, the same that she had left on his sheets three weeks ago. It was _her_ . It was _Marinette_.

Adrien opened his eyes in time to see her hand reaching out to his forehead. He snatched it and held in his, but didn’t dare to plant a kiss there, like he had done many times both as Chat and as her husband. Instead he looked into the bluebells that widened in surprise.

She looked… different. The light in her eyes got dimmed, her skin paled. Even her hair, now pulled into a loose bun, lost their marvelous midnight color, somehow faded. The way her gaze flickered over him left no doubt that she was searching for clues to his state too.

They stayed like that for a moment, staring at each other, until Marinette broke the spell pulling her hand out of Adrien’s grip. She rubbed the place where he touched her as if it burned.

‘You came,’ he breathed in awe.

Marinette’s lower lip trembled before she turned away from him. ‘Nathaniel got me your key,’ she said, voice raspy as if she hadn’t use it for quite some time. She took the key out of her pocket and put it on the coffee table.

‘What? Why?’ He mumbled, still feeling a little groggy from his sleep.

‘You weren’t picking up your phone and after a while all connections went directly to voicemail,’ she replied, forcing the words through pursed lips. ‘Chloe freaked out that something happened to you, so Nath called me.’ She was clearly uncomfortable about being here, uneasiness oozing off her hunched figure.

‘Couldn’t he check on me himself?’ Adrien was getting even more confused with how she was still not looking at him. It didn’t feel like her, like confident and courageous Marinette always ready to face even the most dangerous monsters. Was he worse than all those akumas?

‘He said I need to talk to you.’ She shrugged, trying to keep her voice neutral, but he heard the nervous lilt underneath. ‘That I owe you this much.’

It took a moment for Adrien to fully understand what she just said. His hands clenched into fists. ‘You came because Nathaniel told you to?’

Marinette turned to face him. Anger flashed in her eyes. ‘Nobody tells me what to do,’ she growled. Then she grabbed his phone from the table and pressed a few keys. When the screen remained dark and unresponsive she tossed it to him.

‘Put it to charge. It ran out of power. By now probably more people are freaking out that they can’t reach you.’

‘Like you’re the one to talk,’ he spat, before he could stop himself.

Marinette bit her lips. He clearly hit home. Good.

‘You’re right,’ she said with stinging chill. ‘Enough of pleasantries. Let’s cut straight to the chase. I came here just to ask you to stop.’

‘Stop what?’

‘Stop this!’ She threw her hands up. ‘Stop winding our friends and my parents up! Stop giving them false hope! I don’t know why you’re doing this, but it needs to end.’

‘You really don’t know?’ Adrien asked quietly, searching her face for any signs as to her true intentions. That was not how he imagined their meeting. ‘Were those letters not enough of a clue? Or the fact that I’m not in Japan?’

‘Ah, the letters,’ she muttered and reached for her bag. ‘I brought them back where they belong.’

A huge grey envelope landed on the coffee table with a loud thud. Smaller black envelopes with green paw prints spilled onto the surface. Adrien grabbed a few of them. None was opened.

‘You have got to be kidding me,’ he chuckled humorlessly. All this effort, his and Nath’s, all this work and hope, for nothing.

‘This needs to stop, Adrien,’ Marinette repeated, her voice lined with sadness. ‘I brought them here so that no one else would find them. Please, don’t do this again.’

‘Nathaniel was right,’ he murmured under his breath.

‘What?’

‘You owe me this much.’

‘I don’t owe you anything!’ Her voice clearly trembled even if she tried to keep it under control.

Adrien tore the first envelope and pulled the letter out. He started reading before she could stop him.

‘ _Rue du Sevres. Dear Marinette, this is where you came crashing into my life and made each of my days brighter. Me and your yoyo hit it off right away_.’

 

Marinette gasped and covered her mouth instantly. He quickly opened another one.

 

‘ _Collège Françoise Dupont. Dear Marinette, this is where I met my best friend for the first time. She took my favorite umbrella_.’

 

She reached for the closest envelope and pulled another sheet out, but he recognized it at once. He would recognize each and every one of those letters. He started reciting as her gaze swept over the paper.

 

‘ _Parc des Princes. Dear Marinette, this is where we fought our first battle and you threw me off my feet. I don’t think I’ve EVER recovered_.’

 

Marinette tore several envelopes in one go, as if she wanted to be faster than him. She scanned his writing while he continued reciting those he spotted in her hands.

 

‘ _Le Champo._ ’ He smiled seeing her features smoothen and a ghost of a smile flashing over her face. ‘ _Dear Marinette, remember our first date? The movie was terrible but we didn’t mind. The ice creams were a disaster too_.’

 

She tore and tore through the remaining envelopes until her hands were full of letters. Some of them fell to the floor. He instantly reached for them.

 

‘ _Parc de Buttes Chaumont_ ,’ he said passing her the sheet. Now his voice was reverent, just like the memory it brought. ‘ _Dear Marinette, from the moment I understood this was love for you blooming in my heart I knew I wanted to propose here_.’

 

But she wasn’t with him in Parc de Buttes Chaumont. He saw that right away. She was staring at another letter, another memory, trembling and fighting back the tears. He recognized it now. He pulled her to the sofa to sit next to him. She didn’t resist, almost collapsed herself as her knees bent out of sheer shock. He put an arm around her and kissed her head.

 

‘ _Trocadéro_ ,’ he whispered, his voice soft and gentle, his hand caressing her back. ‘ _Dear Marinette, this is where you witnessed my death for the first time. I’m sorry_ ,’ he breathed into her hair. ‘ _For each and every time a hundred times sorry. I hadn’t known_.’

 

This was what undid her. She buried her face in his shirt as violent sobs shook her entire body. The remaining letters laid abandoned on the floor. Adrien said nothing. He just sat there with her, holding her close, stroking her hair, gently rocking them back and forth. Being with her and for her only.

At last Marinette calmed down. She sniffled a few times and pulled away from him. Slower, as he noticed, more reluctant, but still reserved. Without a single word she slid to the floor and started to pick the letters up, smoothing them out as she piled them on the table. Adrien joined her, silently analyzing her frown from the corner of his eye.

‘Why?’ Marinette suddenly straightened up and waved a hand full of his little notes. ‘Why did you do that?’

He shrugged. ‘To pique your curiosity. To drive you out of your hideout. To finally get the chance to talk.’

‘There’s nothing to talk about,’ she said quickly, but he heard hesitance in her voice.

‘There’s not?’ He cocked a brow.

Marinette chose to ignore him. She wrapped herself tighter with her cardigan, and Adrien couldn’t help to think it looked like she wanted to shield herself from him. Maybe he was on the right path then.

‘Why are you even still in Paris?’ she asked out of the blue.

Now Adrien looked directly at her. She backed away, but kept her eyes on his. He decided it was time to take the initiative from her if he wanted to get somewhere.

‘Is that why you left?’ he asked. ‘To wait until I’m gone?’

Her silence was enough of an answer, but she quickly caught onto it. ‘I asked you first. Why are you still here?’

Adrien kept the eye contact. ‘I’ve been waiting for you,’ he replied with all the gentleness he could afford. Her cool demeanor was slowly getting to him.

‘What about Japan?’ she fired away.

He shook his head. He shouldn’t let her take the lead in this. ‘My turn,’ he stated. ‘You’re not the only one with questions here.’ The line came out rough enough for her to flinch, but she nodded slightly in agreement, so he continued. ‘Why did you move out and left no address? What if something happened to you?'

Now it was her turn to shrug. ‘Nath has my new address, I’m not stupid you know.’

‘And your parents? You hurt them.’ He voiced the accusation before he could think, and pain flashed in Marinette’s eyes.

‘They hurt me first by taking your side in all this,’ she said reproachfully.

‘I thought they weren’t taking sides.’ Adrien couldn’t keep the accompanying snort contained.

She was still standing and hugging herself and he could see that she was preparing to flee any moment now. Her gaze flickered to the door repeatedly. It was time to get to the point, even at the cost of scaring her.

‘Why are you running, Marinette?’ As soon as he spoke he knew he chose well. Sugarcoating would only drive her away. Blunt got the job done.

Marinette froze. Fear, guilt, helplessness were fighting their way to her features. She gaped at him before she squeezed her eyes shut. For Adrien it looked like she was reaching her boiling point, a dozen emotions flashing through her face, until they finally overflew and she snapped.

‘Because I’m scared, okay?!’ she yelled, her eyes still closed. ‘Because I’m terrified to make any kind of choice!’

It hurt that she refused to look at him, but maybe it was easier this way. He didn’t dare to move, just listened while Marinette’s words kept flowing from her trembling lips.

‘I’ve got _15 years_ of making choices, most of them life-or-death kind, in a span of a few seconds on a daily basis, and clearly I’ve got some of them totally wrong!’

She took a deep breath and opened her eyes to look at him. ‘Don’t you get it, Adrien? _My_ decisions. _My_ choices. _My_ stubbornness. It was _me_ who drove us apart. It was _me_ who destroyed us. It was _me_ who hurt you.’

Her hand brushed over a photo on the wall, a family portrait from Adrien’s pre-teen years. His father and mother were standing over him, smiling, happy.

‘You had so much suffering in your life and instead of shielding you I hurt you further,’ she continued, her thumb tracing circles over his younger two-dimensional self stuck in an old picture. ‘I wanted you to go to Japan, to finally start living your dream. To get the life and recognition you deserve,’ her voice was barely above whisper now, as if she was ashamed to confess to all those things.

‘But that doesn’t explain why you disappeared,’ Adrien mimicked her silent tone.

‘I couldn’t stand the thought of being here when you left,’ she mumbled dropping to the sofa again. She looked exhausted over just a few sentences. Whatever was dwelling in her heart, seemed like a burden too overwhelming to bear. ‘I wanted to wait and come back when it’s already done. I was afraid I would be tempted to-‘ she looked away, pursing her lips and refusing to complete the thought.

‘To do what?’ he pressed.

‘It doesn’t matter,’ his sorrowful ex-wife breathed in resignation.

‘So you didn’t go to Milan?’

‘I… I did,’ she admitted. ‘The job offer is quite lucrative.’ She wrinkled her nose, as she realized what she just said. ‘See? I’ve made another mess. Seems like my luck has finally ran out.’ Then with a sigh she rubbed her hands over her thighs. ‘Well there you have it. I’ve answered all your questions. Now it’s my turn. What about Japan?’

‘What about it?’ Her mask was up again, but Adrien was smarter than to believe that.

‘Don’t you want to go?’

He could tell that her concern was authentic. This wasn’t runaway Marinette looking for a pretext, but compassionate friend worrying he might lose his chance.

‘Yes, I do,’ he said. He decided he would never lie to her again. ‘But there are also other places I want to be. There are choices to be made.’

Maybe it was time to put all the cards on the table. If she didn’t care for him, she would have already left.

‘I want to try again,’ he declared. It was vague, but Marinette clearly knew what he was referring to. It would be hard not to, considering what had transpired between them just a few weeks ago. Neither of them could deny they had feelings for each other. Two lifetimes of them.

She hugged herself again, not meeting his gaze and that was all the confirmation he needed, that there still was a chance.

‘Marinette, please, look at me,’ he pleaded and continued only when she complied. ‘No one said this will be simple. It can’t be,’ he said sadly. ‘But if we decide we want to make it work, we sit down, we talk, we go through our options.’

‘Japan was your dream.’ There was a hint of accusation in her voice.

‘New York was yours,’ he countered.

‘It’s too late for New York, but there’s still time for Japan.’

‘Then you can come with me,’ he offered, hoping he sounded serious enough.

‘And leave my job and my career here?’

It really hurt when she scoffed at him, but he took it in stride. ‘We’d have enough money after I sold my shares at Gabriel.’

‘Money isn’t everything,’ she was closing herself again, he could see that. Already denying them a second chance over her misguided attempt at fixing his life. It was clear she was looking for excuses.

‘Then I can apply for a job at CERN,’ Adrien quickly supplied. It wasn’t really quick thinking on his part. He really did check his other options while he had been waiting for her. ‘In comparison to Kamioka it’s just around the corner. And with the money I’ve inherited you can start your own company should the fancy take you there. And you can do that anywhere,’ he said earnestly. He wouldn’t allow her to slip away again. ‘Who knows, maybe it would be even better to leave Paris, at least for a while. Have a clean start?’

Marinette kept silent, her gaze fixed on the window, as if she was contemplating escaping that way.

‘What I’m trying to say is these matters shouldn’t be a reason for us not to be together,’ he soldiered on, faltering for a moment when he saw her frown. ‘There’s always a way. There are phones, skype, planes, holidays. There’s plenty of ways we can go about it. The question is, if we’re doing it at all. We can figure the how as we go.’ The important thing, Adrien thought, was to present the case like the decision has already been made and it left them only with the details to work around. Maybe she was just scared to say it out loud? Maybe she would go with it, if he left the door open for her?

She pondered on his words for excruciatingly long moment.

‘But don’t you think if there are so many obstacles, then maybe fate is trying to tell us something?’ she finally said.

Cold shivers went down Adrien’s spine. Fate? Just like Sabine had said. She would throw it all out of the window because of something so stupid as the concept of fate. He felt the frustration and rage that he had been trying to keep in check all those weeks finally leak out.

 

‘Screw fate, Marinette!’ he all but burst in righteous anger. ‘This is not about fate, about “what’s meant to be”! This is about what you and me want and make of our lives!’ He started gesticulating animatedly, as he usually did when he had been agitated. ‘It’s only us, no one and nothing else!’

She stared at him, eyes blown wide, mouth ajar. Adrien took in her startled expression and immediately changed his mental gear. He didn’t want to intimidate her, but to convince her.

He stopped a few paces away from his guest, and stilled himself with a deep breath. ‘This is about me asking the woman I love if she is willing to give us another chance,’ he spoke with passion, words finally flowing freely straight from his heart.

He could hear breath hitched in Marinette’s throat. Wasn’t it already clear how he felt?

‘I want you in my life, Nettie. Be is as your husband, friend or acquaintance,’ he added gently, fully aware what he wanted as his end game, but willing to accept any other solution allowing him to be with her. Those godawful paintings still lurked in the depths of his memory, reminding him, how she desperately needed a friendly soul who could understand.

‘If you don’t want to do the couple thing with me anymore, I’ll understand. If you want to be friends, I’m fine with that. If you choose to see me only four times a year at Alya’s, Nino’s, Félicie’s and their little one’s birthdays, that okay too,’ he needed to reassure her he wasn’t going to put any kind of pressure on her. ‘But I don’t want  you to be with me or not just because of _fate_!’ He spat the word as if it burned his tongue, but then he remembered why had she ran away. ‘I don’t want you to feel guilty about what happened. Maybe it could have been avoided, maybe it couldn’t. Water under the bridge. I don’t fucking care!’

He started pacing around the room again, emotions getting the better of him. He barely registered the wetness in Marinette’s eyes and the longing look on her face.

‘I won’t pretend I wasn’t hurt,’ he continued. ‘I won’t pretend I haven’t though really nasty things about you. I won’t pretend I am totally okay with trusting you after all those terrible things we’ve said. Hell, I’m still pissed that you’ve disappeared on me like that,’ he needed to get those words out. Now or never. If there was at least a tiny chance, that he could convince her, he had to be absolutely honest. No more half-truths or easy truths, no more lies. Sabine taught him to be better than that.

‘But that’s life, bad things happen. And they will keep happening because that’s how reality works,’ he ran his fingers through his blond locks while Marinette’s eyes traced the movement. ‘But it’s our choice what we’ll do with it. We take the effort and make this work or we go our separate ways. In life nothing is a given, nothing is granted forever. You only get so many chances. I don’t want to miss another one. I don’t want to lose you,’ with that he turned to her and came to the sofa. He had all her attention. She wasn’t going to run away now, it was clear.

‘The thing is, Nettie, I cannot promise you there’s going to be a happy ending,’ he sat at her side. ‘And you can’t guarantee that either. All I can offer is a new opening and we can work around that to eventually make it happy,’ he ended, short of breath and emotions that he just let loose.

‘Too much has happened between us,’ she whispered, a bit uncertain, her defenses still up. ‘I- ‘

‘I spoke with Nath,’ he interrupted her. She started, eyes questioning how much he knew. ‘He showed me your paintings,’ he confirmed her unvoiced suspicion. ‘He told me why you had been visiting him. I stitched it all together so that I finally got the bigger picture.’

Marinette shuddered. She looked even more hurt and scared. ‘So you understand now that I’m broken? That I’m a failure?’ She cried, voice shaky and hollow. ‘That I can’t do this with you anymore?’

Tears glimmered in her eyes and spilled to her cheeks, and Adrien felt the fire burning within him again.

‘Are you fucking kidding me?!’ he rasped, throat clenched and dry. ‘A failure? You?’

He stood up and walked to the window to move the curtains aside. ‘See that?’ He pointed at the buildings basking in afternoon sunlight, the blue ribbon of Seine glimmering in the distance.  ‘Our city is safe! We did this, together. _You_ did this.’

‘But at what cost!’ Marinette wrung her fingers painfully as if she tried to punish herself. ‘I’ve ruined our lives, I’ve ruined your family.’ She stated in shame.

‘Stop it! I do not allow you to belittle and hate yourself like that,’ he growled. That woman could have him in heaven or in hell in the span of just few seconds. ‘You’ve always had me to protect you and I won’t stand aside watching you get toppled over by life. I won’t watch you get swallowed by the darkness I saw in those paintings. I promise that I will chase it all away, if you let me stand by your side again.’ She needed help, maybe even therapy, and more than anything, he wanted to be the person who’d go through that with her, be there for her. But it wasn’t his choice.

Marinette kept her gaze locked on the palms entwined on her lap. Her lip trembled slightly and a tremor ran through her body.

‘What do you want from me, Adrien?’ she finally sighed in resignation, hiding her face in her hands.

That was it. That was the question he sought the answer to himself for so long. Not “I’m sorry”, not “I love you”. What did he want? He knew exactly what.

‘I want you to be my wife again, Nettie and I want to be your husband. I want to be the first person you see every day and the last before you close your eyes. I want to be allowed to hug you, kiss you, cuddle with you and make love to you,’ once he started his litany there was no way of stopping it. ‘I want my world to spin around you. I want to have kids with you. I want to get old together. The whens and the hows are not important right now.'  He paused, letting his words sink in. 'But what matters most is what _you_ want, Nettie.’

He walked over to her and kneeled down pulling her hands from her face. He brushed each palm with a soft kiss and looked into the wet sapphires surrounded by the dark fringe of eyelashes.

‘Now that you finally know how I feel, what do _you_ want from _me_ , Marinette?’ he repeated in a trembling voice. His eyes lit up with a strange gleam. He didn’t know if he was preparing for elation or a final blow.

 

 

***

Adrien woke up with a groan. It was dark again. He was lying on his sofa and his back hurt like hell. His right hand was totally numb, frozen in a position typical for holding someone. Someone who had covered him with a blanket and had slipped a pillow under his neck. Someone who had brushed his bangs from his forehead.

Someone who was no longer there.

The living room was silent, empty and dim.

Adrien felt the rush of blood surge through him at the recollection of the earlier events, of talking to Marinette and of the final outcome. He willed himself to calm down and waited for his heart to climb up from his stomach, for his lungs to take air in again and for his head to stop spinning. Then he shook his sleeping arm to rush some blood into it and stood up to turn the light on.

It was hard to determine the time. He had no idea for how long he had been sleeping. Long enough for the sun to set, that’s for sure, but was it evening, night or early morning? Adrien started a search for his phone, but he couldn’t locate it anywhere.

It was then when he saw the sheet of paper on the kitchen counter, folded in half so that it could stand and be visible from afar. Never in his entire life did Adrien run faster indoors that when he made a dash for that piece of paper.

It bore Marinette’s neat handwriting, only a few words this time.

 

 

> _BRB_
> 
> _Your fridge was empty_
> 
> _There’s a guest coming_
> 
> _xxx_

 

A guest? Now? He had been dead tired, their talk turned out to be quite an energy drain on top of the exhausting last few weeks, but he surely wasn’t so out of it to forget about a guest. Adrien doubled his efforts to find his phone. Just as his search proved fruitless he heard steps in the corridor and Marinette’s amused voice.

_‘Yes, Nino. We’re almost at Adrien’s. …  ...  Yes, we’ll be staying here.  ...   ... …  Don’t worry, we have everything.’_

At that she reached his apartment and he heard her fumbling with keys. Adrien wasted no time in opening the door for her. On his doorstep he found not only the adorable if slightly tired bluenette but also his feline goddaughter who grinned at him and happily nodded in her aunt’s direction.

‘We will be fine, really,’ Marinette said to the phone and rolled her eyes good-naturedly at him. ‘Just go to Alya already, or you will actually miss the whole thing!    ...    ...    Yup. Bye!’

‘Here’s our sleeping beauty,’ she chirped from the doorway as soon as her call ended. With a flirty smirk she passed him shopping bags that occupied her hands.

‘Oh, auntie,’ Félicie giggled wholeheartedly. ‘Uncle Adi is not a princess!’

‘Maybe not,’ Marinette wrinkled her forehead considering this, ‘But he was sleeping and you have to admit he is quite handsome.’

‘Yeah,’ the girl chuckled like only five year olds can. ‘Too bad he’s taken,’ she added with a Chat Noir worthy mischievous grin.

Adrien was wracking his brain for a witty comeback when he noticed that Marinette talked to Nino using his own cell.

‘Did you steal my phone?’ He quirked a brow at her, earning a snort.

‘Nino called a few times but you just wouldn’t wake up, so I answered,’ she took off her coat and helped Félicie out of her own. ‘I figured it might be something important and it was.’

‘Little dude is coming! Little dude is coming!’ Kitten Noir chanted enthusiastically, jumping up and down, her tail flicking behind her. ‘I’m gonna be a sister!’

‘Sure you are, Kitten. And the best one in the whole world!’ Adrien ruffled her hair and lifted her up to the barstool by the kitchen counter. He passed her crayons and a pad and soon she was totally absorbed with her newest piece for the Adrinette collection. At least now she had live models for her art right in front of her, together.

When the groceries were stored away Adrien put on his apron and went to help Marinette with the cooking. He was hungry, as if he hadn’t been eating for the last few days, so he earned a few smacks from the chef when he tried to taste something in secret. Soon the three of them sat at the table biting into their filet mignons and rosemary potatoes. Adrien personally prepared the accompanying green salad with vinaigrette sauce.

It was nice. He didn’t remember when he enjoyed a meal more. He took Marinette’s hand and gave it a little squeeze as if checking if she was real. She flashed him a wide smile and slowly blinked in return. Kitty kisses. A definite gain there.

There were still so many things they would have to discuss and decide. The cracks in his heart were still there, but they seemed to be closing. The ladybugs in his stomach on the other hand were definitely multiplying. His head was light, his limbs finally full of energy. His face a bit sore from smiling, as he had been neglecting the exercise in that department for quite some time.

It wasn’t perfect, it wasn’t exactly happy and it definitely wasn’t an ending. But he still felt he should drink to that.

 

 

* The End *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here it is Ladies and Gentlechats. Happy? Angry? Disappointed? How do you feel now?  
> Please, let me know. I appreciate your comments greatly.
> 
> If you like my writing, check out my other stories. There's fluff and angst and humor. Just pick anything up your alley!  
> I'm also on [tumblr](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/perditaalottachocolate-blog), where I share miraculous stuff and sneak peeks of things I'm working on.
> 
> Next on my update list: _I have no idea!_ At some point there's going to be my ML Secret Santa Exchange story, and I will do my best to post or update something else this December, but this is usually the most busy month for me, so be patient!  
>  Till next time!


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